Bloodstock Open Air 2026: 25th Anniversary – REVIEWED!

THURSDAY

WOOSH. That’s how fast I feel 25 years of Bloodstock Open Air has flown by us. From humble (but excellent) beginnings in the Derby Assembly Rooms to this epic anniversary 4 day extravaganza, there is no doubt that Bloodstock has grown into a stalwart of the scene. On top of that, there truly is no other festival out there doing what BOA is doing for breathing new life into the genre, with year-round events and platforming new bands on multiple stages throughout the festival – the mission statement is clear: the longevity of metal and it’s fans is paramount.

This year I want to take some time to talk about the people of Bloodstock, the ones who have been coming since day dot, and the new blood who are here on hearty recommendations – I managed to chat with a lot of people this weekend, so enjoy some little vox-pops from the fans as we go along.

© Anna Hyams – do not use image without permission.

First to hit the main stage on Thursday’s extra innings, are the joyfully silly Heavysaurus.

Yeah yeah, they might have been originally intended as a kids’ introduction to metal (Finland, of course) but there is a very large bearded-and-tattooed contingent in the front rows, proving once again that metalheads are far from scary.

Playing real instruments, in fucking massive dinosaur costumes, in this heat is legitimately an insane thing to want to do with your life but I truly appreciate the hustle and genuinely think they sound great. A mix of their own weird and wonderful Tweenies-esque songs and classic rock hits make for an epic sing-along, and it is kind of amazing to see so many kids in this audience living their best lives.

Playing ‘The Final Countdown’ gets a giggle from me, since BOA was host to Europe in 2009 and we, the British public… were absolutely obnoxious, singing the intro after every single song they finished until they finally played it. Ah memories. Also, a massive shout out to every single person who came in an inflatable dinosaur outfit today, there is nothing quite as joyful as seeing a heap of t-rex heads peeping out of the pit.

© Anna Hyams – do not use image without permission.

Taking a quick trip over to the merch stall behind the main stage proves once again difficult, despite the efforts to make camping-chair sections, this corner of the festival is still Gandalf-levels of impassable and danger laden. The queue for merch is easily an hour deep in winding channels of irritated people snarking at each other, but it seems especially silly that there isn’t a barrier channel for the access queue, leaving those in wheelchairs in the rough position of being left at the side or with no choice but to block the pathways around to the bar and New Blood stage. A few people made a vocal plea to staff to change things around, but honestly? I really think that the merch stall would be better suited to being situated in the main entertainments/shopping field, where it could also be a lot bigger.

Bloodstock has always been a champion of designing festival merchandise people actually want to wear, and the offerings have gotten more interesting (S’tan stabubuOddballs pants collab… inspired actually) but in practice it’s a decent chunk of time to sacrifice to get hold of something. The app order/collection thing is a fantastic idea, but sort of relies on there being phone service which Bloodstock is notoriously devoid of, and anyway – the majority of the items weren’t available on there. Here’s hoping this develops further AND they decide to move the stall elsewhere for future layouts.

© Anna Hyams – do not use image without permission.

Up next, the eagerly awaited return of local legends Evil Scarecrow. Once again, there is NOTHING that will stop the British public from uplifting something that started out as comedy, into real positions of power (see also: Count Binface, his Binificence). As such it is utterly unsurprising to see an absolutely humungous crowd turn-out for a boogie to the likes of ‘Shred The Evidence’ (complete with images of Trump… heehee) and ‘Green Bin Day’.

“Holy mother of god… we are so grateful to be here partying with you! There ain’t no crowd like a bloodstock crowd…” yells Dr. Hell, before launching into ‘Release The Krakhen’ whilst sharing the stage with a giant er… cock Rooster. Heavy Metal Hairdresser joining them on stage to yell about eggs wasn’t on my bingo card – we love a little cameo moment, but by far the peak point of this incredible set, is the entire field scuttling for ‘Crabulon’. All hail Evil Scarecrow!

Rounding off this fantastic first night we have a full circle moment with the mighty Saxon headlining – after being the first ever Bloodstock headliner in 2001. It’s hard to encapsulate just how seamless Saxon are as performers, good solid classic metal, totally unpretentious and completely engrossing. Rocking his classic black military coat and his shock of white wizardly hair, Biff Byford’s voice honestly sounds as good as ever. Despite noting that he’s had a few health problems over the last few years, you wouldn’t guess with the ferocity he is bringing, and “This is our motto… Never Surrender” feels so fitting.

“I think they should do Thursday night every year, look at you beautiful people” garners a roar from the massive crowd, and our ears are ringing after a belter of a set including the classics ‘Heavy Metal Thunder’ and ‘Denim and Leather’. “Some of you weren’t born in 1980… maybe most of you… doesn’t matter, you’re all in the family now” quips Biff, as they finish up with a cracking encore featuring ‘Crusader’, ‘And The Bands Played On’ and finally ‘Princess of the Night’. Stellar headline choice, thanks Bloodstock.

© Anna Hyams – do not use image without permission.

FRIDAY

Battlesnake kick things off with peak levels of silliness, bouncing around in cassocks and golden devil horns far earlier in the day than anyone should reasonably be that unhinged. Then Party Cannon (naturally, from Scotland) seized control of their banana‑themed mosh pit and turned it into something right on the edge of illegal I think.

A gigantic penis‑shaped guitar, lead singer Daryl losing a shoe to the crowd, and their attempt at a Guinness World Record not landing at all because nobody could actually hear him – all par for course in the Party Cannon playbook. They were promptly denied the attempt to blast sound over 420 decibels because, well, danger… and public nuisance? Eventually they “killed” him and turned him into a “human squelcher” which I suppose is one way to finish things, but despite the absolute nonsense, they do actually great, which is lovely.

Up next – Skynd is an incredible vocalist, and the theatre she brings to the stage is really beautiful, and though I do think she absolutely is deserving of a main stage slot, I do think her music would be better suited to the atmosphere and darkness of the Sophie stage tent instead. I need a little gloom with my doom yanno?

We take a quick tour around the shopping centre and end up spending our pennies in the Stay Stainless ring shop, and snapping up a Clutch tshirt for a fiver from Plastic Head – what a bloody bargain. I have my beady eye on the Dead Cats Club overlook hotel cardigan for the autumn, and I would dearly love to be the kind of person that can drop a bag on the Black Feather Designs 25th Anniversary Bloodstock necklace available at Nox, but alas, being a festival goblin does not pay very well (and they’re a limited run of only 25!).  

© Anna Hyams – do not use image without permission.

Over on the Sophie stage Sellsword tick this years’ symphonic box with soaring guitars, but we head back to the main stage for Life of Agony who are giving us that Alice in Chains/Type O Negative, classic chuggy metal vibe. There are definitely less people in the arena today but there’s a decent circle pit regardless, and the man in a full suit and flat-cap standing in the middle directing it like a traffic warden, makes for very compelling entertainment.

Over at the EMP stage, the band Vanitas are hauling around a trolley full of snack filled purple goody bags for kids, and handing out tshirts for small rockers to wear to their show later on this evening. 10/10 adorable behaviour (and excellent PR, because we will indeed be going back to see them).

In the Battle Arena, we give the Hellbent Hoedown a look and let me tell you… it is not the place for the malcordinated. I was only doing the steps at the side and holy spider-on-rollerskates batman, that was too much for my brain-legs pathway to handle. Very fun though, and the Y’allternative outfits some people had brought – excellent, no notes.

© Anna Hyams – do not use image without permission.

We collared a lovely man in a ‘Bloodstock Virgin’ tee to ask how his first time was going, and he excitedly divulged that he had just completed his first ever crowd-surf after being encouraged to by strangers at the main stage. Showing me the back of the tshirt that said “I’m scared, hug me”, he said he couldn’t believe how friendly everyone was – my number one Bloodstock point, every year.

Later on we also bumped into the lovely Natasha of @flamingofruitsalad – you may know her by her iconic split pink and orange hair, and excellent fashion choices – who was also experiencing her first ever Bloodstock. We had a chat about the metal community, about honouring your interests and choosing to do the things that make you happy in life – a very wise soul.

Next up Biohazard are downright insanity from the off, screaming “HEY YOU BRITISH MOTHERFUCKERRRRSSS” and thrashing around the stage. Despite the heat there is an immediate flow of crowd surfers heading towards the stage, and when we are instructed to throw middle fingers in the air for ‘Fuck The System’ – they truly all go up, even some very small ones from grinning kids.

Municipal Waste continue the mayhem with stage pyro and even more crowd surfers, and a cheeky joke about taking a hydration break before screaming “Are you still with us? Get in the fucking pit!”. The sign of a true OG thrash band is cushion soled trainers and a knee brace, I just need everyone to acknowledge the dedication, but I do wonder what happened to the attempt at a wall-of-death that was hastily recalled into a circle pit – was this a tactical choice or a telling off?

© Steve Dempsey (Courtesy of Bloodstock)

The now infamous BOA announcement segment is upon us, where we get to hear what’s in-store for the 2027 line-up and I’m surprised and delighted to see a real cross-section of the genre on offer already. The biggest crowd cheers go to Acid Bath and Green Lung, but I’m pretty excited to see HammerFall and Gutalax back, and super interested to peruse the message boards later to find out what everyone thinks of the headliners – Mercyful Fate, Electric Callboy and Motionless In White.

© Katja Ogrin (Courtesy of Bloodstock)

Next up it’s the fondest of farewells to the incomparable Sepultura. This 40 year celebration tour (which is now actually in it’s 42nd year, haha) really is coming to a close now, and the turnout for them is sincerely stonking today. Wall to wall black tees ready to go… “Bloodstock, you know what to do… OPEN THIS FUCKING PIT UP” is all the instruction anyone needed to go berserk. With no discernible drop in energy or intensity from any other time I’ve seen them, I can safely say that they leave behind them a massive hole in live heavy music – today vies for space in my memoirs with every single time I’ve seen and loved them. The group of heavy-metal Sweeps (…of Sooty fame) down the front are headbanging in their tiny battle jackets. I do love how Bloodstock seems to attract group silliness on a very core level.

In this scorching heat the riffs feel like a lashing, and Derrick Green screaming down the mic with such raw unfiltered power will forever be seared into my ‘perfect music moments’ file of memory. ‘Roots Bloody Roots’ is of course the only choice for a finale, “Thanks for the memories, we’re gonna miss you England” – what a way to bow out, I am so grateful to have had one more mosh about.

In the EMP tent, Vanitas (of great PR fame) are absolutely ripping up the tiny stage and the tent is jammed with people – including a lot of kids proudly rocking their gifted tshirts. I hope the band got a shitload of photos of this. Aside from the clever freebies, I truly hope we see them back on a bigger stage here in future because they’ve got all the ingredients to be epic. I mean, I do love that symphonic/epic prog edge anyway, but they’ve got the theatrics to go with it – do your thing Bloodstock, let them go bigger and more immersive. I’ll be in the front row with the kid, who is now claiming personal ownership of the fanbase.

© Leigh van der Byl (Courtesy of Bloodstock)

Tonight’s headliner Lamb of God are no stranger to topping the bill at Bloodstock, having headlined fairly recently in 2022 – and by the looks of this packed arena, the BOA crowd is excited to have them back. Heralded by a huge explosion of red fireworks and flame screen backdrops, it’s clear that the production level tonight is intended to stun. Popping out in a pair of cargo shorts and an understated The Jam tshirt, frontman Randy Blythe looks like a fan who has made his way to the stage, which I kind of like. The contrast between huge stage setup and casual attire is charming to me.

On the less twee end of things, the absolutely massive circle pit swirling in the centre of the arena seems to be growing and taking in more people like a demented whirlpool. “This song is called Grace… FUCK THIS PLACE UP” comes the call, as Randy launches himself off the drum riser, almost kneeing himself in the eyeballs. The atmosphere is electric, as he spins the wired mic around his head and stares into the chaos.

‘Walk With Me In Hell’ showcasing stunning riffs and heart thumping beats has every hook to draw you in, it is impossible not to move to this, and the crowd response proves undoubtedly that Lamb of God have well and truly established themselves as top notch repeat headliners. Not taking themselves too seriously is another surefire way for bands to endear themselves in my eyes, shouting “Are you fackin’ ready you cants” in your best Danny Dyer accent will in fact delight me.

“This next song is a drinking song. I wanna know who’s gonna make some poor life choices tonight” also generates a giggle, not least from the friends of the lobster-red staggeringly-drunk man in front of us, who already looks like he’s made some dicey decisions today. Finishing up with the brutal combo of ‘Momento Mori’ and ‘Redneck’ I can honestly say that this headline set felt like it had zero dips in energy, which is really rare.

© Anna Hyams – do not use image without permission.

It may be the end of the night for the main stage, but we attempt to duck into the Sophie tent for Wednesday 13 where all the ghouls have pooled. I love seeing the baby goths alongside the elder emo’s having a lovely bounce about to some horror punk. Look what the bats dragged in, indeed. I do however wish we could have seen them on earlier, because I am le tired and there’s no way he’s going to do ‘I Walked With A Zombie’ before the final 3. Peace out, this Vampire’s sparkle is waning for tonight.

© Sophie Jones (Courtesy of Bloodstock)

SATURDAY

In a super sad start to the day, I did not make it in for Froglord. 10.30 is an insane time in the morning for a cult gathering. Despite that, I am reliably informed that the amphibious attendance was suitably large and that they were indeed excellent. All hail hypnotoad and all that.

Later in the day, Urne bring some gloom to the proceedings (it is VERY hot today already) but I am off to have myself a lovely time with local(ish) legends Viking Skull from Corby. Another tale of a band formed for somewhat comedic purposes, turned into a beloved and anticipated band on the Bloodstock bill , with ‘Red Hot Woman’ being a real highlight of the set.

© Katja Ogrin (Courtesy of Bloodstock)

Vended from Iowa, draw a very fighty-punchy pit, but the drums are mixed so high you can barely hear a tune under the barrage. It kind of works for the chaos they’re trying to summon but I do think I’m going to enjoy them more through headphones. I do quite enjoy the whole Furiosa/Mad Max aesthetic though.“On this next song I wanna see insanity” gives the nod for another round of pit savagery, which is really what its all about, right?

Cancel the Transmission over on the EMP stage bring a classic southern-rock style that allows us a bit of a reprieve after the Vended chaos, and then Northlane whip it all back up again. Now look, I am a person that enjoys a fun outfit but… we are all seeing Harry Styles meets BMTH right? Right? Anyway, some security guys came and moved a load of chairs from the no-chair zone (the first time it’s been enforced this weekend) and now the arena is packed back standing for this very enjoyable rowdy set.

A quick wander to the RAM Gallery is a lovely breather to see all the incredible artwork and amazing guitars on display. I’m obsessed with the case full of historical tickets, photo passes, and old rock society laminates – lots of which I have in my collection. Looking back on the incredible Paul Gregory artwork is like touring my own festival history, it’s nice to take a few minutes and appreciate it all. The Lemmy and Ozzy tribute areas are also great, with Bloodstock being a family-friendly event it does feel quite special to be able to take your kid in and give them a little historical significance reminder. After all, if they’re going to keep the torch lit – they’ve gotta know the gods.

© Sophie Jones (Courtesy of Bloodstock)

Tempest Saint on the EMP stage are almost giving hair-metal, I’m not wholly sure they’re not reincarnated or something, because they look radically too young to sound they way they sound before you see them. I’m down anyway, keep the spirit of all metal alive. NEVERMORE, on the other hand, suffer from a bit of a meh crowd. They’re good – I do rate the sound,  but it just isn’t landing today. We’re hot and tired. We’ve jumped around a lot. Sure we’re celebrating 25 years of Bloodstock, but some of us have 40 year old necks and backs (try and say that without singing the rest… you know what I mean). Sometimes that’s just how festival afternoons go.

Mechanized in the Serpent’s Lair VIP tent are a total surprise, and whoever is working the sound in this tent is killing it. Their “fuck AI, keep live music live” message gets a cheer from the beanbag-lazing audience. They really deserved a bit of a healthier crowd to jump around but a lot of people are taking a rest break, so it does look a bit funny.

Following this, Bleed From Within arrive to absolutely obliterate the main stage. Now. They’re not a band I particularly follow or have ever really engaged with before. BUT. They may be going down as my band of the day? First of all, bagpipes belong in metal. I said what I said. They were made for battle purposes, fight me.

Second, kilts are the superior choice of attire for a summer festival. They also look cool as fuck. There’s an interesting spiky Iron Throne sort of stage prop thing, and their sound is immersively dense – I love a band you can listen to in layers, and continue to find interesting parts. “We are Bleed From Within from Glasgae in fuckin’ Scotlanddd!”  roars frontman Scott Kennedy, before adding, “What I was trying to say before someone tried to hit me with a shoe… thank you to every one of yas for being here, it means the fuckin’ world.”

Kudos to this “…band from a tiny town called Hamilton” who came together 23 years ago, “When I say out for blood… scream out for war!” makes it absolutely clear they are commanding the stage when thousands of voices join them. They gush that this is the biggest slot they’ve ever had at any festival they’ve ever played, and I truly think we could be looking at a future headliner in them. “The only reason this is possible is you. You can never ever fucking forget how important you are in all of this. Bloodstock, make some noise for yourselves!”

Finishing up with some jumping up and down and giant black 25th anniversary inflatable balls being launched into the crowd, the Scotland flags waving proudly from the pit, the band declare it their favourite show they’ve ever played. I’ll be taking more notice from here on out, because that was a fucking irn triumph.

© Anna Hyams – do not use image without permission.

Tonight’s headliner Slaughter to Prevail might be one of the most controversial bookings of Bloodstock for a number of reasons. Despite more recent and less antagonistic commentary, Russian frontman Alex Terrible’s media history is… ahem… chequered, to say the least. There’s also a frankly insane amount of consternation over what people think is ‘deserving’ of a festival headline slot. I’ll be completely transparent here – it isn’t really my jam, but I want you to know, I personally thought that tonight proved a point. Presence is everything.

Opening with a barrage of flames, sparks, smoke and furiously flaming screens is one way to make a strong entrance. Those chrome masks (which, by the way, are selling for £200 at the merch stall) really add to the theatre of it all, but ‘Bonebreaker’ stands up just fine on it’s own. Raw power and clean guitars make for a ferocious introduction.

 “Two years ago we played Download Festival and today we headline this beautiful festival” shouts Terrible. “I’m living my best fucking life, I’m living in the matrix… it feels special”. Thanking the UK repeatedly for the opportunity, definitely goes a way to endearing this crowd, and we love a bit of self-deprecation “I love this country so much… I’m so nervous, my English still sucks”.

‘Bratva’ “…this is a song about family” elicits a cheer, when Terrible celebrates the fact that guitarist Jack Simmons is from Essex and that his whole family are here in the crowd tonight. However, the abject hilarity of them attempting to get everyone to squat down ready for a chorus jump –  “I don’t care how old you are or what you do for a living… my knees are fucked, I will jump as high as I can!” – and one solid dude in a bright white tshirt amongst the sea of black, just completely refusing to do it – priceless.

‘Demolisher’ and ‘Conflict’ are a back-to-back brutal assault before they finish up with ‘Kid of Darkness’ and ‘Behelit’. I think a lot of people have come away from tonight enjoying that set a lot more than they thought they would. “Bloodstock, I hope we did not disappoint you guys… thank you. You were so kind to us.”

SUNDAY

Castle Rat are what I imagine would be birthed from a union of the confidence of Whitesnake, the musical stylings of Black Sabbath, and the aesthetic coding of those feral kids from Yellowjackets. So obviously I fucken’ love em’ don’t I. I do feel for the dude rocking a full plague-doctor getup in this heinous heatwave though, especially as the arena is a bit flat due to all the… well… hiding from the sun. The entire EMP tent is carpeted with pale beleaguered goths. Anyway, I’d love to see them again under less sweltering circumstances please.

© Anna Hyams – do not use image without permission.

A quick trip over to Happy Maki Sushi for a bite to eat (sincerely all scran looks cracking this year, but I can’t face eating anything hot, so it’s this and a blue slushie for nutritional balance), and a wander back via some of the lovely indie traders for a mooch. As always I was tempted to buy an irrationally large drinking horn and belt holster, but I am reminded of the time I failed extremely badly at drinking one of those yard of ale things and smelt like a wet dog all night, so it’s a pass.

Dean of the Dead’s hot sauces looked like they would make excellent Christmas presents for people but I’m going to have to hit them up online, and I’m now kicking myself so hard for not buying a little double ghostie ring from The Last Jewellers stand. After a quick catch-up with Bloodstock Darth Vader, were also paid a visit by Bloodstock Santa, who did indeed have a bag of treats for kids around the arena – I swear some of the most whimsical people on this planet are metal fans. Thanks for the bubbles!

Next up, Kittie hit the main stage looking absolutely badass as per usual, with Morgan Lander rocking a red mic/red dress combo that is just peak 90’s style. Launching into ‘Fire’ with unmatched fury, it’s clear they mean business. It warms my heart to encounter so many awkward teenage girls down the front, getting involved in the pit and crowd surfing – hello new era of fans. More than a few rage-fuelled millennial mums are also mixed in, screaming along with daughters atop their shoulders, ensuring that generational wrath and being fucking epic can be passed down too.

© Steve Dempsey (Courtesy of Bloodstock)

It might not be a very long set, but it’s perfect – “It’s what you’ve all been waiting for… this is Brackish” shouts Lander, and the pit erupts in a tangle of flailing limbs. They shoot right to the top of my best bands of the weekend.

Orbit Culture bring doomy music in blazing sunshine, which is a Bloodstock speciality. “How the fuck are you doing Bloodstockkk? We are Orbit Culture from Sweden! Are you guys warm? It’s the same for us cold‑ass Swedish men up here…” does make me giggle, yeah man – we’re the country of weather complaints, this is the arsecrack of hell for us, welcome. Sadly there’s a mid-set stoppage to let some medics through to the front to help someone, but they manage to squeeze in ‘Vultures of North’ as a closer after the fan makes it out safely.

Wrex on the EMP stage are a fun electronic/metal duo that I probably need to have a proper listen to, I think they could be very fun to catch on tour, followed by another Bloodstock OG – Testament. They have an enormous skeleton-friend on stage with them (like an even better version of the Costco one I am banned from buying actually…) and proceed to melt everyone’s faces off with pure classic thrashy bashy goodness. There’s a lot of pyro and hair wafting, I love them, truly the Best-ament.

© Steve Dempsey (Courtesy of Bloodstock)

Next, Black Label Society have drawn an enormous crowd in the relentless evening sunshine, Zakk Wylde is rocking a kilt and whoever is on the sound tent is doing an absolutely immaculate job, as they open with ‘Funeral Bell’ – what more could you ask for? Well. You could squeeze down the front with your 6 year old and let her ride towards the stage on top of you as you crowd-surf… there is that…

© Graham Finney (used with permission)

The rest of the set was perfect, and even included a montage of Ozzy photos on the big screen alongside ‘No More Tears’. I’m always amazed that someone who is 90% hair can play as well as he does without ending up requiring extraction tactics. I bow down to you sir.

In the Sophie tent, Mushroomhead have gathered a huge crowd and open with a Spongebob singalong that immediately descends into gut busting chaos for ‘Eye To Eye’. I swear they are one of the most underrated 90’s bands out there because this is a fucking stellar set, an absolute treat for both the ears and the eyes. Masks, hair spinning, water-laden drums, lasers… you name it, they’re doing it. Oh and there are so many members I can’t even tell who the band really comprises of. They’re metal’s answer to the So Solid Crew I think.

“Time to participate — let’s move this place!” comes the call, and who are we to not answer? A giant circle pit is the order of the day, after Ms. Jackie hops into the hands of some fans to sing mid-crowd. Again, this band is just FUN.

On the main stage Body Count arrive with Ice-T shouting “Body Count is in the house!” followed by a Slayer ‘South of Heaven’ nod. I’m not sure what happens but about halfway through it seems like some speakers go out, and there’s a huge loss of sound to the back of the arena, which is pretty annoying for the rest of their set.

Luckily Ice-T loves a bit of a chat and is there to make everyone laugh, “How many people at their first Body Count show? Fuckin’ virgins…” he quips as they throw themselves into ‘The Purge’ and a cheeky rant about politicians not giving a fuck about us. Given the state of the world right now – everyone is inclined to agree and join in throwing those middle fingers up. After inviting a couple of little kids on stage to rock out with them (er… jealous, Harrison and Sebastian – you’re cool as fuck), Ice-T declares himself to be every bloodstock kid’s newest Uncle, and gives us all some important life advice in the form of a song…  “I have a 10‑year‑old daughter and I taught her this… talk shit, get shot”. I genuinely think this is one of the best bookings Vicky Hungerford and co. have ever made, and really was worth the years of chasing. The pit is popping off, so much so that organiser Alan Hungerford can’t resist jumping in for a bash about himself!

© Anna Hyams – do not use image without permission.

The weekend’s final headliner Judas Priest close the main stage tonight, with a set of epic proportions. I must preface this with the information that whilst I am not really a Judas Priest fan (I’m sorry, don’t come for me… I just never have been), I do recognise a packed arena when I see one, and there’s the obviously pleasing nature of having a Midlands band headline this Midlands festival’s anniversary year.

As the giant curtain drops they rip right into classic ‘You’ve Got Another Thing Comin’ and Rob Halford screaming  “Oh Bloodstock, your Priest is back!”.

‘Breaking The Law’ elicits a site-wide singalong, and will never fail to remind me of two other rock icons – Mr. Beavis and Mr. Butthead. I also fully love the enormous disco-ball that gets lowered into the stage during ‘The Ripper’, which is so brightly lit that it looks like some kind of giant malevolent sea-urchin from afar. I must also mention the multiple jacket changes Rob makes throughout the show, with a special shout out to the wondrous sparkly lamé trench, the massive fringed biker, and the final disco-ball replica jacket. OH and the denim patch trench, which is also being worn by a couple of members of this crowd – incredible work all round.

“25 years of Bloodstock Open Air? 100 years of Judas fucking Priest. We really love this festival.” Jokes Rob, who then talks about their upcoming new album and about defending the faith of rock and roll for 56 years. I guess 25 years is small potatoes to a band who have been stage side for half a century?

‘Painkiller’ arrives with epic lighting and a drum solo, and then as per usual Rob returns to the stage riding his Harley for ‘Hell Bent For Leather’, in yet another outfit. Going out on ‘Living After Midnight’ does feel a little bit amusing before 11pm but hey, that’s showbiz baby. It might not really be my highlight, but it was a very solid and fitting way to close this chapter of the Bloodstock story…

© Anna Hyams – do not use image without permission.

BUT WAIT

Because I am now immediately up and running to catch my ultimate wishlist set of the weekend, inconveniently at the peak of my tiredness of course. The tent is wall to wall bodies already in the smoky deep red lights, and French synth wizard Carpenter Brut is headlong into those heavy electro ripples that make your whole body shake.

The Venn diagram of synth and metal fandom is way more integrated than people on either side of the equation often like to admit, but holy hell does CB obliterate that line between them – and if there’s one thing any metal fan is going to cave and resonate with? A silly 80’s cover. Carpenter Brut’s ‘Maniac’ cover (yes of Flashdance fame, thanks Michael Sembello) is a true triumph and there’s not a single person standing still in here tonight.

© Anna Hyams – do not use image without permission.

In his robotic operating voice CB calls “Prove you are alive… scream it” and something primal is awakened in the people of Bloodstock – this is the last chance to absolutely throwdown before you go home. After the recent sad news of the death of another French synthwave legend – Kavinsky (yes, I am devastated) there’s a soothing quality to seeing this many people out enjoying the genre. The lighting, the sound, the visuals, the atmosphere – flawless. “Thank each and every one of you for this beautifully loud ceremony” – No, thank you CB, and thank you Bloodstock.

While I understand the wish for continuity and purity some people would like for this festival, I do feel like there’s space to navigate the vastness of the metal genre and learn something new in all it’s facets. BOA has always been good at bringing new music to our ears and searching out those acts that deserve a spotlight. I think 2027 could be really, really interesting.

© Anna Hyams – do not use image without permission.

THE LONG ROAD FESTIVAL ANNOUNCES LEGENDARY ROLLING STONES GUITARIST RONNIE WOOD AS SATURDAY HEADLINER

The Long Road Festival is proud to welcome musical legend Ronnie Wood and his band headline the main stage on Saturday 29th August. Joined by Irish favourite Imelda May, these two award winning artists will deliver an exhilarating set, filled with timeless classics and beloved hits. 

Few can claim to have had as stellar, or diverse a career as Ronnie Wood. Influencing a generation of musicians, and a two-time inductee into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame (with The Rolling Stones and Faces), Ronnie has played in some of the most pioneering rock groups of all time, and guested with a who’s who of British music. Long establishing himself as a vital part of The Rolling Stones sound, Ronnie’s incredible journey with The Stones, Faces, Jeff Beck Group, The Birds, The Creation, Rod Stewart, Ronnie Lane and his solo work, defines him as one of rock music’s most important figures. 

Imelda May has become one of the UK & Ireland’s most celebrated female artists selling millions of records worldwide, who has gone on to perform alongside legendary artists including Lou Reed, Bono, Tom Jones, Noel Gallagher, Elvis Costello, Robert Plant, Van Morrison, Rod Stewart, Jeff Goldblum and, of course, Ronnie Wood.  

The UK’s favourite immersive Country, Roots & Americana festival will arrive for its seventh year on the August 2026 Bank Holiday weekend (27th – 30th), returning to the stunning grounds of Stanford Hall in Leicestershire

This year’s event will feature a stellar collection of rising stars, chart-toppers and genre legends including 14-time GRAMMY winner Emmylou Harris playing the final show of her European farewell tour, globally renowned country-pop favourite Maren Morris’s only appearance at a UK festival this summer, Nashville Songwriters Hall of Fame member Steve Earle, CMA award winners The Shires and breakout country star Josh Ross.

Beyond the music, The Long Road offers the chance for audiences to step off the beaten track and truly immerse themselves in the country lifestyle. Activities include line dancing for all abilities, late night afterparties, open mic opportunities, Stateside food traders, craft beers, food competitions, the Lucky Dice Car & Bike show, vintage funfair rides, country bingo, cowboy olympics, country crafting, barn dances, and the ever popular ‘country-oke’. For all things culinary, Red Dog Saloon will be bringing their Austin-style BBQ restaurant on-site, smokers and all, to deliver a unique festival experience.

Friday, Saturday, and Sunday Day tickets, Weekend General and High Falootin’ VIP tickets, Family & Group tickets, General and Premium camping, Live-in Vehicle, Pitch & Park, and Glamping packages are on sale here.


Where to find The Long Road: Official Site | Facebook | Instagram | X | TikTok


FULL LINEUP:
Ronnie Wood and his band featuring Imelda May ★ Emmylou Harris (European Farewell Tour) ★ Maren Morris (UK Exclusive) ★ Steve Earle (Solo & Acoustic) The 502s ★ The Shires ★ Josh Ross ★ Shakey Graves ★ The Felice Brothers ★ Anne Wilson ★ Kezia Gill ★ Rose Betts ★ Lily Fitts ★ Uncle Lucius ★ Oliver Hazard ★ Jason Scott & The High Heat ★ Noah James ★ Ken Pomeroy ★ Zandi Holup ★ Striking Matches ★ Dylan Earl ★ Jim Lauderdale ★ Rosalie Cunningham ★ Liam Price ★ Mia Kelly ★ Slow Motion Cowboys ★ HORSEBATH ★ The Hanging Stars ★ Sarah Jane Scouten ★ Trevor Moss & Hannah-Lou ★ Stella Prince ★ Harleymoon Kemp ★ Harper O’Neil ★ Chanel Yates ★ Shaylen ★ Simon Howard ★ Hayley Jensen ★ Chandler Walters ★ First Time Flyers ★ Emily Scott Robinson ★ Twinnie ★ Dawson Anderson ★ Errol Linton ★ Knucklehead ★ Outpost Drive ★ Luca Fogale ★ Dan Byrne ★ Jonny Morgan & The Moral Support ★ Lizzie No ★ Susto Stringband ★ Riley Downing ★ Ryan & Rory ★ Muireann Bradley ★ Ferris & Sylvester ★ Sheyna Gee ★ Jordan O’Keefe ★ Bec O’Malley ★ Gina Larner ★ William Matheny ★ Smithfield ★ Brennen Leigh ★ Bobby Dove ★ Sweet Thieves ★ Locks

4 DAYS LEFT! All Points East – Annual Photography Competition

Calling all artists, photographers and creatives!

All Points East have announced details of their annual art and photography competition, placing the spotlight on grassroots, undiscovered talent. What does Victoria Park mean to you? Have you managed to capture the essence of All Points East?


The festival is inviting creators of all ages and skill levels to submit artwork, photography or designs that capture the heart and soul of Victoria Park. A true celebration of local talent, it’s a wonderful opportunity for emerging artists to get their work seen by festival-goers and the wider public. 


Alongside winning tickets to this year’s festival, the winner will have their work displayed within the park.
To enter, entrants need to e-mail a high-resolution image of their work, their full name and preferred social handle to [email protected] by Tuesday 4 August.

All Points East takes place from 21 – 30 August, with headline performances from Jorja Smith and Tems on Friday 21 August, Lorde on Saturday 22 August, Deftones at APE x Outbreak Fest on Sunday 23 August, Tyler The Creator on Friday 28 and Saturday 29 August and Twenty One Pilots on Sunday 30 August. Tickets are on-sale now via allpointseastfestival.com 

(T&Cs apply – see Festival site/socials for details) Winners under 18 must nominate an adult aged 18+ to receive and use the All Points East tickets)

10 Bloodstock Festival Side Quests – 2026!

With Bloodstock Open Air’s sold out 25th Anniversary less than a week away, you’re probably knee deep in the group chat’s clashfinder negotiations, arguing about who will actually wake up early enough to party with Battlesnake or whether you’ll be alright to eat a burrito in the middle of the Stampin’ Ground pit.

The thing about festivals is, even if you find a dead spot on the bill where nothing quite tickles your pickle – that doesn’t have to mean a trek back to your tent for a cheeky nap – instead I implore you to slyly sneak away and take yourself on a delightful festival side quest. Build the lore you want to fondly and tipsily tell your unwilling children, years from now.

Aside from the classic tales of ‘imbibing something questionable offered to you by someone questionable’ and ‘waking up in someone else’s tent who is now screaming’, I offer you these ten silly curated side quests that probably pose considerably less hospital/jail risk.

  1. Bin Jousting – they tried to stop it, they tried to regulate it, they tried to commercialize it… but you can take this tradition from BOA campers’ COLD DEAD ABSOLUTELY FILTHY FINGERS. No for real, you’ll probably get stopped by security but if you can get a couple of good neck-jarring runs in, you will actually be participating in one of Bloodstock’s oldest and most nostalgic traditions. For legal purposes I do not endorse it AT ALL, IT IS A LITTLE JOKE OK.

  2. The sanctioned fight occurring this year according to BOA HQ is, er, Pillow Fight Club. Shh, we aren’t meant to talk about it. 4.30pm Friday/Saturday/Sunday if you have a desire to smash a mate’s face in a nice way. There are a LOT of rules and a waiver, which is a little bit lame but honestly would have made Fight Club the movie a whole lot funnier. The ‘remove all piercings’ part might be a hard sell in the Bloodstock community though.

  3. Faaaancy Dress – always a good idea, mostly a poor execution. This year’s 4 day offering lists as: Dinosaurs on Thursday for Heavysaurus (a classic, excellent crowd-surfing kudos), Twisted Fairytales on Friday (If you find a wolf in your tent pretending to be your grandma, alert security), 1980’s on Saturday (be the Tom Selleck you want to see in the world, bring back men in crop tops and short shorts), and finally LOTR/Fantasy on Sunday (if anyone can mix up the 80’s and this theme to produce Gand-ALF, I will buy you a beer you hero).

  4. Hellbent Hoedown – has Y’allternative gone too far? Yeah yeah I know, both cultures love leather and like to sing about drinking beers, but if I get another fringed jacket to the eyeballs in the pit, I’m gonna… whinge about it later. Steel City Line Dancers are taking command of the floor on 2.30pm each day to lead some stompin’ with a metal soundtrack. If you’re not the two-stepping type, no worries – you can always grab a drink and go and heckle everyone who’s trying to.

  5. Black Ice Cream – apparently it is back with a ‘new and improved recipe’ and I would like to know if that is because last year it tasted how imagined… like dirt or licking a lump of coal. I do bloody love ice-cream though so yeah, I’m going for it. Oh no… what if it’s the same as the Whitby black ice-cream… Liquorice. Actually I’d rather lick a lump of coal than that.

  6. The RAM Gallery – Ah g’wan, you call tell your ma you spent the weekend being cultured and seeing lots of art, without lying. It’s a lovely peaceful little space away from the hubbub of the festival for a short while, and a great tour through the history of BOA. Oh and there’s going to be a Ozzy Osbourne custom guitar (made by Paul Cutting) in there too.

  7. Bunnyman’s Bunnychow – Take on the Hot As Hell without a drink. This famously delicious festival delicacy obviously comes in various spice laden levels, but frankly you’re just a lil bitch unless you go all in. Who doesn’t want a lovely little molten ball of lava in their tummy, threatening to Pompeii the shit out of everyone in a three-metre radius of you, when you get a bit too bouncy during Carpenter Brut?

  8. Rockfit – Look I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, I do not identify with nor understand those of you who WANT to exercise. I will however support your right to do it, especially when accompanied by a banging soundtrack. If you’re the energiser bunny of your camping group, just piss off to Rockfit, have a grand time, let everyone else sleep off their hangovers. This is how you remain friends, trust me.

  9. Puns for Testament – admittedly this is a very personal and niche nod to times past here, but I’m going to bring you all in on it. Back in 2007, my mate Lee and I were ABSOLUTELY FUCKING FREEZING, waiting for Testament to take the BOA stage and in a state of teeth chattering delirium we decided that making ourselves laugh was the only way to go about getting warmer. It was the Bestament. I didn’t even need a spare Vestament. I would like to invite you to be part of this very silly Questament. Actually the real reason I mention it is to highlight that at BOA you can often join the Signing Tent queue and have a chance to meet some of your heroes – another excellent use of your side quest time. The next day, Lee and I did just that and *somewhere* in my chaotic festival memorabilia stores… is a poster of Testament with “Nice Breastaments” scribbled on it, amongst their signatures.

  10. Last but certainly not least – find Jesus. Not like that. Bet he would have been a metal fan though. Jesus is a BOA staple and always has the time to greet, bless, and take selfies with fans. If you’re not a Lamb (of God… *snort*) you can always find Bloodstock Darth Vader and have him bless you instead. There truly is something for everyone here.

Godspeed, go forth and seize the festival days!

Lakefest 2026 Preview

Just two weeks until Lakefest returns to Eastnor Castle Deer Park in Herefordshire for its 14th edition.

Billing itself as “the ultimate summer celebration for grown-ups who party, families who play hard, and everyone who loves brilliant live music, tasty food, cold drinks and proper festival atmosphere” – Lakefest has something for everyone.

From its humble beginnings as a small lakeside gathering, Lakefest has now grown into one of the UK’s most welcoming festivals, blending big-name headline acts with emerging talent across multiple stages.

This year’s headliners include The Charlatans, Example, Madness and Bananarama – with iconic acts such as Lightning Seeds, Scouting for Girls, Soul II Soul and EMF all performing on the Abbey Main Stage across the weekend.

Over at the Xerjoff Scenting the Scene At Funkytown stage, General Levy, Tinchy Stryder, Newton Faulkner, Reef and East 17 will all be making appearances along with Flash: A Tribute to Queen, The Jam UK and Utah Saints.

Lakefest is also bringing a taste of the Balearics to the Herefordshire countryside, hosting a Sunday Ibiza Beach Party in the A Restrospective of House tent. Big names such as Todd Terry, Judge Jules, Lisa Lashes and Seb Fontaine will all be playing high-energy crowd-pleasers, harking back to the golden era of Ibiza.

The Cheshire Cat Club will be hosting a wide variety of events throughout the weekend including DJ sets from Woody Cook and Bez from the Happy Mondays, performances from Senser and local act Dub Catalyst – as well as food demos from Beefy Boys and even movie screenings.

Beyond the music, Lakefest offers creative workshops, children’s activities, fairground rides, and a wide choice of food and drink, making it a true celebration for all ages. With its relaxed atmosphere and beautiful countryside setting, Lakefest is as much about community and fun as it is about great live music.

On top of the entertainment there’s also the annual theme, which this year is Flower Power – so expect to see plenty of flares, psychedelic prints, tie dye and bare feet as revellers channel their inner Woodstock!

Lakefest takes place from 5-9th August at Eastnor Castle Deer Park in Herefordshire.

Day tickets are still available through Lakefest.co.uk.

Credit Lakefest

2000 TREES 2026 – THE BIG REVIEW!

Who’d organise a festival, eh? Well, James Scarlett organises two – so he’s clearly a glutton for punishment!

On top of rampant economic costs, heatwave conditions and a constant bothering from Soccerball fans wanting to watch “the match”, he had to navigate a couple of pretty unexpected changes of plan in the build-up (which Summer Festival Guide covered here).

Despite these uncertainties, the doors to 2000Trees were opened promptly at Wednesday lunchtime, letting the eager beavers get themselves set up before the action kicked off.

For those unaware, the festival site is at Upcote Farm, a working farm which is around 20 minutes’ drive from the centre of nearby Cheltenham. They’re only small roads on the run up to the site, so be prepared to have to wait for a while before entering, but on balance you’re so close to the site entrance once into the parking area that it evens out.

Alterative transport options include a shuttle bus service from Cheltenham Spa train station provided by Big Green Coach which runs on Wednesday and Thursday and then back on Sunday for £16 in advance. The station itself has regular trains direct trains from London Paddington, Birmingham New Street, Bristol Temple Meads, Cardiff Central, Manchester Piccadilly and Edinburgh Waverley stations – so getting here couldn’t be easier.

Welcome to Trees! – Credit Gareth Bull @garethbull.co

Once you’re through the parking/drop off area it’s down a steep hill, across a narrow bridge, and then a steep uphill through a rugged pathway before some more wobbly terrain past the campervans. You’re then into the general camping area which offers an overflow area, as well as accessible camping and VIP upgrade options.

Despite it taking place on a hilly farm, every effort is made to create an accessible space for festival goers with mobility issues, and following a rejig of the parking situation last year the organisers took on the feedback and made the necessary tweaks to improve that further still.

Designated accessible camping areas, all-terrain mobility scooters to navigate the undulating ground and viewing platforms at stages to allow unobstructed views make it clear that all are welcome.

Inclusivity is another key aspect of 2000Trees. People are free to be themselves, find their people, live their best lives and to do so free from fear of any sort of prejudice or persecution. In a society that is absolutely hoaching with division and hatred, 2000Trees becomes a safe haven – and that adds to its immaculate vibe. The Trees community fully restore my faith in humanity every year and I am grateful for the annual reminder that it ain’t all shit.

Families are also catered to, meaning those elder emos with bairns are able to re-live their youths while keeping the wayuns entertained. Trees puts on a chocka programme of activities for kids – with the line-up in the Word tent featuring everything from circus performances, yoga, drag queen story hour and interactive sing-a-longs. It also provides a welcome spot of shade to keep them out of the sun – a definite plus in this weather.

These are all elements that combine to make 2000Trees one of the most welcoming and accessible festivals in the UK.

Campers arrive on Upcote Farm – Credit Joe Singh @snaprockandpop

Thanks to heatwave conditions forecast for the duration of the week, preparation for festival-goers followed a similar model to 2025. That made packing a lot easier, the pile of discards containing wellies, raincoats and fleeces while sunscreen, caps and fans were on the tick list.

Having had the experience of emerging from my tent like Jim Carrey from the mechanical Rhino in Ace Ventura 2: When Nature Calls last year (IYKYK), I invested in a Black + Fresh tent from Decathlon (not an ad) and can confirm it made a big difference over the duration!

I also added a canopy style shelter to the campsite set up to provide much needed shade and right next to the Camp Frabbit stage, making it a) easy to find and b) giving us front row seats to the line-up for the week. Unsurprisingly after two heatwaves already this year, the ground was unforgiving to tent pegs – so heavy-duty options were brought out.

On to the music!

It’s good to be back! – Credit Gareth Bull @garethbull.co

Wednesday always feels like a private event to me. The full festival doesn’t open until Thursday and a lot of folks hold off arriving until then, which gives those early attendees the opportunity to take in an extra day’s fun.

As with previous years, all of the performances on day one were split between The Word stage and The Forest. Bands alternate between them, but you’re only a couple of minutes’ walk between the stages – so even with the five-minute gap between acts you’re not going to miss a lot. The Word tent has had an upgrade this year, so there’s even more capacity than before.

In the Forest, signs encouraging folks not to occupy space with chairs/hammocks etc were in place after last year’s debacle and throughout the week they were (mostly) adhered to.

Last year’s main stage-r Karen Dió returned for a Wednesday slot in The Forest and kicked off with ‘Euphoria’ before the Hives-esque new single ‘Free Yourself’ ramped things up further.

Karen Dió – Credit @avigayilmusic

The set didn’t slow down any as the Latin Riot Grrrrl ploughed through a set of punk-rock bangers including ‘Stupid’, ‘Cut Your Hair’ and the best cover of Chappell Roan (‘Casual’) you’ll ever hear.

Karen showed her appreciation for the early attendees who came out to see her set, and took the opportunity to play the shortest, or rather most concise song, of all the sets across the weekend – ‘Buy My Merch!’

Closing out the set with ‘Sick Ride’ – she announces “I’m coming in!” before jumping over the barrier to join in with the crowd on the forest floor. It’s an excellent start to the weekend.

A new EP (Fugaz) comes out next month, along with a summer of festivals across Europe and then back to her adopted home for a UK tour covering Glasgow, Manchester, London and Brighton. Dió’s star is rising and we’re all in for a sick ride!

Then it was time for some admin and a wander over to the merch tent to pick up my pre-ordered Trees x 4Ed (the charity raising money to tackle Motor Neurone Disease via the Gloucester Rugby Foundation) rugby jersey – which came up a bit short, so swapped it out for the next size up with zero fuss.

Just some of the merch on offer at 2000Trees – Credit Summer Festival Guide

As ever, its an absolute Aladdin’s Cave of wonder in there! The always popular 2000Trees football shirts available in Home and Away were £45 (kids £30). Line-up t-shirts were available in black, natural, orange and skeleton (Adults £30, kids £20) hoodies for £50 and a fetching pair of shorts for £30.

Clashfinders were £8, Socks £10, Sunglasses £15 and caps (available in black, yellow, natural and a cool skeleton design) were £25 apiece and flying out of the tent, along with some of the more off-piste options available.

These included the annual appearance of Lou’s Brews hot sauce (£10), limited edition prints (£20) and even a Tragic: The Gathering playing cards (£7) and dice (£20) which sold out almost immediately! I managed to witness a gleeful moment as one of the merch staff found the last set of dice for one customer, making their day in the process.

Tragic the Gathering merch – Credit Summer Festival Guide

I also collected my pre-booked headphones from Silent Disco King (£35 of which £25 is returned a few days after the festival). The fun starts each night after the final headliner as DJs play sets across multiple channels and stages. There are even live sets from bands (and the football commentary…) which creates the utterly surreal experience of bands performing in silence, but it’s a lot of fun.

Back to the shade of the Forest and it was one of those bands I was VERY excited to see – Hyphen.

He combines genres into a fusion of rage-filled rap-rock which covers socio-political issues, from immigration, racism and corrupt politicians (Farage) and has an audience rallying behind every word.

‘This Is Great Britain’ questions how great the country is, and spotlights ‘Dave the Racist’ who reads the Daily Mail and blames immigrants rather than the powers that be: “So Dave doesn’t get what he needs. He’s told to blame me. Divide and conquer, rinse and repeat. Trying to be kind but David, I’m not the fucking enemy”

An absolutely incendiary ‘This Might Be It’ has the pit absolutely frothing, while the unexpected sing-a-long chorus of ‘Desk job’ (“Desk job or sex tape? Suck d*** and get paid!”) goes down (pun intended) a storm.

Hyphen – Credit Summer Festival Guide

Newest release ‘SAID WHAT I SAID’ and its refrain of “Fuck you! Yeah, I said what I said” covers AI, billionaires and the hypocrisy of racists enjoying an onion bhaji and GOES OFF!

More festivals await this summer, as well as going on tour with Kid Kapichi later this year and a new EP on the way. Hyphen is ready for bigger things and I reckon we need him more than ever.

Heading back to the campsite to meet friends, eat, play some games (Can Off is an absolute winner) and make the most of the chilled beers left in the cooler, it was a few hours before heading back for Irish band, Sprints.

Ireland has always been a musical nation, but even by their standards they’re in a rich vein of form and Sprints are part of that wave.

They (and the crowd) look like they’re having a shit load of fun up there, as an energetic set of punk rock with songs referencing French philosophers (‘Descartes’), Czech poets (‘Beg’) and desire (‘Something’s Gonna Happen’). There’s also an excellent cover of Le Tigre’s ‘Deceptacon’ which is a weekend highlight for me.

Karla Chubb of Sprints crowd surfs – Credit Gareth Bull @garethbull.co

Addressing the crowd, powerhouse frontwoman Karla Chubb asks: “Are yiz all sweating your balls off?”. The answer is a unanimous yes, balls or not.

For the final song, ‘Little Fix’, the band asks the fired-up audience: “Can anyone play guitar?”. The call was answered by a young woman in a backpack (it stayed on throughout) and so Chubb got herself into the mixer, crowd surfing as the set came to a triumphant end.

It’s a brilliant set, and if you’re not already familiar with Sprints then get on it!

PUP are a band I hadn’treally come across before and that is a profound own goal on my part! The Forest is absolutely buzzing ahead of the set from the Toronto natives who are playing their 2016 LP The Dream Is Over’ in its entirety.

Crowd surfing starts from the off and the “Woo, ooh-ooh, woo, ooh-ooh’s” of ‘DVP’ get even newcomers to the Canadian’s repertoire involved. The weather-appropriate ‘Sleep In The Heat’ can’t be held responsible for the conditions, but would it have killed them to have another one called ‘Light Drizzle For A Little Bit’?

Crowds at PUP’s Forest stage set – Credit Jez Pennington

They tease some of tomorrow’s main stage slot setlist with ‘Reservoir’ and the woozy love song ‘Hunger for Death’ bringing an epic set to a close and then it’s time for a White Russian.

A trip to the bar and a selfie with organiser James Scarlett and co-conspirator Gavin McInally and then it was time for Trees stalwarts Thrill Collins.

They take to the stage in front of a headphone wearing crowd, with the light blue colour on the headsets making the Forest look like it had been taken over by a phosphorescent algae bloom!

Thrill Collins playing a Silent Disco set – Credit Joe Singh @snaprockandpop

A set of pop, rock, garage, drum and bass covers goes down a treat. They even manage to have their own version of a wall of death – “Let’s call it a wall of love!”. The love is definitely flowing from both sides of the barrier, as they tell the crowd they are “Panto good” (“Oh no we aren’t!”) for their participation. It’s a cracker and they never fail to deliver.

And so, to bed, attempting to avoid the classic too much, too soon with three full days ahead…but not until I’ve had a couple of White Russians…

THURSDAY

The second wave of weekend ticket holders begin drifting onto site early doors, hunting down their friends and family to join in the fun, selecting prime locations wherever possible.

Oxfam volunteers giving out wristbands – Credit @avigayilmusic

Among the keenos who arrived yesterday a number made their way, yoga mats under arm, into the Forest for an early morning session. Others took the opportunity to join the queue for a bacon sandwich – people contain multitudes.

The main arena opened up for the first time, revealing more food vendors and some changes to the previous years’ layout. Most noticeable was the expansion of the Marshall Tent (who now have naming rights to the stage formerly known as Neu) and subsequent relocation of the Arbor bar to opposite the Marshall Stage.

This meant the Frank Water stall moved around the corner, closer to the VIP entrance, in between food stalls.

Buds. were first up on the main stage. The Southampton four-piece have played Trees for the last three years, as well as having attended as punters – so their connection with the festival is a strong one.

Their set begins with a slightly delayed soundcheck due to DON BROCO’s gear still being on stage, which gives them chance to hand out party bags with balloons, bubbles, party hats, Lego keyrings, Haribos and lollies to the already assembled masses.

Goods courtesy of Buds. – Credit Summer Festival Guide

Singer Dan confessed his voice was “Fucked” but reassured us they were just going to “Pretend it isn’t!” – a bold approach considering they’ve got busking stage slots over each of the coming nights!

Buds. – Credit Jez Pennington

At one point Dan also twats himself in the face with his guitar, causing a nosebleed which is sub-optimal during the biggest show of their lives – but he soldiers on and its pretty metal, if sore.

New single ‘Time Well Spent’ is a three-minute pop-punk smash hit with a sing-a-long chorus, ‘Grit’ has an infectious chorus (“I’m a layabout, I ain’t got no grit. I’ll never know what a hard day work is”) and ‘Picking Wounds’ just bloody rocks!

Ending with the genuinely excellent ‘Building Blocks’, the crowd sings along, blows bubbles and releases balloons in a joyous celebration. Chants of “Buds, buds, buds, buds, buds…” continued throughout the weekend and they’ve definitely left Upcote with a raft of new fans after this showing.

Buds. on the main stage – Credit Jez Pennington

Dropping in on Yorkshire’s Goo on the Marshall Stage, their set is filled with fuzz-laden riffs and gives me a bit of a Courtney Barnett-vibe. Their debut album ‘Oh Wow, Oh Well’ came out in May and gets its moment in the spotlight throughout the set.

Singles ‘Payday’ and ‘Slow Morning’ feature, along with earlier releases ‘Call In Sick’ are standouts along with the fantastically titled ‘Tiny Dinosaur That Only I Can See’.

A quick coffee stop and then it was back to the campsite to meet one of our party joining us for their first ever Trees. A tour of the festival site, including the necessary admin of wristband and headphone collection, and it was time for a beer.

The partnership Trees has with Arbor means you’re always guaranteed to have good quality, and often gluten-free, beer options throughout the site – but it’s at the Arbor Bar you’ll find the broadest selection. Lagers, IPAs, NEIPAs, low-alcohol options and even Stouts – it’s all there.

There are also a selection of picnic benches outside which offer a view of the stage (part of it anyway) giving you the opportunity to take a load off and still enjoy the action.

Credit Jez Pennington

There are also food options galore at Trees, ranging from the classics of Fish and Chips, Fried Chicken Pizza and Burgers through to Gyros, Pad Thai and Paella. There is always a genuine focus on providing vegan and gluten-free options too which means you’re pretty much set when it comes to feasting.

I’m lucky enough not to have any dietary restrictions, but each of the stalls is very clear about allergens where there are any – and if they weren’t obvious, customers were encouraged to ask.

I tried to dip into the Marshall Stage for snake eyes, but the humidity in there was nuts and the breeze outside was providing much needed respite so I bailed. Maybe next time.

Mariachi el Bronx were next up on the main stage and the sudden influx of cultural appropriation/sensible sun protection in the form of sombreros spelled out what was to come.

Sombrero wearing fans at Mariachi El Bronx – Credit Jez Pennington

Entering the stage in pure Mariachi drip, the band (who would be performing as The Bronx later on) proudly announced that Trees had “Never had a band perform as a mariachi band and then as a punk band later that same night”– a genuine Upcote Farm first, put that on your bingo sheet!

It all began with an album of the same name which they released in 2009. They’ve since toured as both bands and revelled in the fun the former provides. They’re clearly supremely talented musicians and the addition of mariachi brass, squeeze boxes and a frankly mad number of guitars provide a sound perfectly suited to a sunny afternoon.

Mariachi El Bronx – Credit Jez Pennington

My personal favourites from the set were ’48 Roses’, ‘Cell Mates’, Norteño Lights’ and set closer ‘Revolution Girls’. It was hard to stay still throughout and I wasn’t the only one! In fact, a conga started in the pit and there was even a spontaneous limbo dancing competition at one point.

It was a fun-filled affair and in the spirit of cultural appropriation, I went and got nachos for a little snacky snack. Fiesta Nachos from Banging Burritos were £7 and you got a big portion with sour cream and Pico Di Gallo…can’t say fairer than that!

Credit Summer Festival Guide

The weather gods, not content with scorching all before them with a heat wave, threw an insane tornado-like gust of wind into the mix! Hats went flying hundreds of metres up into the air and were then joined by a frigging umbrella (no sign of Mary Poppins for a secret set). It was a bizarre sight and let to a post on the official Facebook group for survivors of the 2000Trees Tornado 2026.

Standing out in front of the main stage had taken a toll on us, that or the beers, so we went back to the campsite to recover with a high-octane game of Can Off and a few more bevs – along with a wardrobe change given the sweat fest the AM had triggered.

Can Off involves throwing a frisbee at a pole with a can on the top, which you have to knock off. You can try to catch it, which earns you points, or you just smash everything to pieces in front of you and hoon the can half way to Stroud.

Can Off in action – Credit Joe Singh @snaprockandpop

We drew in a few spectators and participants, even an official photographer at one point (thanks Joe!), and the consensus was overwhelmingly positive.

With a day-saver ticket purchased to the struggle bus, it wasn’t until the early evening before I made my way stage-ward again. This time it was into the Forest and Native James.

There was a huge amount of hype ahead of time off the back of a massive set at Download and the amount of people stood waiting for it to begin was a testament to that.

Kicking things off with ‘Power’ and then ramping it up with the monster track, ‘Hammer’ the forest floor was soon churned up by a heaving pit. ‘DO WHAT YOU WANT’ lit the touchpaper even more (if that was possible) and I honestly haven’t seen a show like it on that stage before.

Native James – Credit Jez Pennington

Native James gave 100% for every second of the 40-minute set and the crowd responded in kind. A huge wall of death and a constant swirling pit – it was fucking intense, the kind of set that people talk about all weekend and then a hell of a lot afterwards too!

He has a headline show at Nice ‘N’ Sleazy in Glasgow at the end of the week (tickets are less than £15!), Cowgate Block Party in Edinburgh, Latitude Festival, Outcider Festival and Secret Island Festival all still to come this summer. It won’t be long before those slots and venues will be much bigger.

I headed to the always brilliant Manjula (more of them later…) for a portion of Marry Me Tofu which was one of their daily specials, along with their usual array of delicious plant-based street food including Burritos, Nachos and Curries. I wasn’t sure I could handle mashed potato in a heat wave, but I triumphed in the face of adversity and it was bloody lovely!

Having taken on the mantle of PUP fan yesterday, it was time for their second show of the weekend and my second in 24 hours which basically makes me a super fan as far as I’m concerned.

Pup – Credit Mac Praed @Mac_Praed

I really don’t know how I’ve neglected them for so long but my Spotify wrapped will definitely reflect my newfound…erm…finding, of them.

There was some overlap between the sets, which is to be expected – especially as they’re bangers – but we got songs off debut LP ‘PUP’, ‘Morbid Stuff’ and ‘Who Will Look After The Dogs?’ too. New single ‘Concrete’, released at the end of June, also got air time giving the punters a full spectrum of PUP eras in one 50-minute set.

Following their cover set in the Forest on Wednesday, PUP’s Canadian comrades The Dirty Nil were also back in action at the Marshall Stage.

Formed in 2006 they’ve an enviable back catalogue including five LPs to work with and were here to rock from the off opening with ‘That’s What Heaven Feels Like’ followed by ‘No Weaknesses’ and ‘Rock N’ Roll Band’.

The Dirty Nil – Credit Gareth Bull @garethbull.co

They were making a statement, flying out of the stalls and taking no prisoners – I’m just glad I had earplugs!

I also managed to nip into the Axiom for Superheaven’s show too (the beauty of the site’s compact layout) thus navigating one of those bloody clashes that are unfortunately always going to happen.

Taking the opportunity to sit down at the back of the tent, it was cute to hear them so clearly enthusiastic about the opportunity to play Trees (their first time). Catching the end of their show I was treated to their Deftones-esque ‘Youngest Daughter’, along with the genuinely excellent ‘Crawl’ both from 2013’s ‘Jar’.

Crowdsurfers during Superheaven – Credit Jez Pennington

Their set finished with ‘Poor Aileen’, a Bush-a-like grunge track that whisked me back to the mid 90’s with little effort. A double whammy of two excellent bands and then it was on to main stage duties.

The super last-minute cancellation by Alkaline Trio meant there were still a lot of shirts knocking around, and those fans were able to seek solace in the arms of Silent Disco, where the excellent Gemma Edwards (check out her TikTok) devoted part of her set to the band.

Their replacements, DON BROCO, had plenty of their own fanbase present but addressed replacing Alkaline Trio early doors – Rob Damiani telling the crowd: “These are impossible shoes to fill. We hope Matt gets better”.

Don Broco – Credit Jez Pennington

They headlined in 2024 and showed they were more than capable of holding it down then. I’ll be honest, gutted as I was at Alkaline Trio having to pull out, the Bedford lads are a hell of a replacement.

Reflecting on receiving the call to replace them not long after finishing their support slot for Biffy Clyro, he said: “This time last week we didn’t know we’d be playing tonight. It didn’t take us any time to say yes. It’s a massive, massive honour!”

Set opener ‘Cellophane’ has been rattling around my head since the announcement, although I am 99% certain Damiani is singing “Do you have the Mini Rolls?” and now I want Mini Rolls.

While there was no sign of Nickelback for ‘Nightmare Tripping’ plenty of songs from the album of the same name did make an appearance. ‘Somersaults’, ‘Disappear’ and ‘Euphoria’ were all met with the same love for the oldies and they even drew proceedings to a close with ‘Hype Man’.

The fact the band (and crowd) was able to slip so seamlessly between the new tracks and the staples is a testament to how finely tuned these guys are!

Rob Damiani of Don Broco surveys his kingdom – Credit Carla Mundy

They’re by no means the first or last to heap praise on organisers and the behind-the-scenes teams for their efforts in putting on the best festival in the country, but there’s genuine sincerity in their words.

I legged it away from DON BROCO to try and catch Static Dress but the Cave tent was absolutely chocka so I stood outside to listen to set closer ‘human props’ then hot footed it back…not quickly enough to hear ‘Bruce Willis’ though – sadly.

I also missed the hydration break, that much-maligned feature of the World Cup which has drawn boos from fans and criticism from coaches and players. It wasn’t getting off lightly here either! Boos rang out before they kicked back into action and set things up for their encore.

Don Broco take a hydration break “BOOOOOOOOO!” – Credit Carla Mundy

Coming back out with their absolutely massive ‘Everybody’ into ‘T-Shirt Song’ and a swirling mass of t-shirts over heads before ‘Hype Man’ brought things to a finale. You have to take your hat off to the boys for the willingness to step in at late notice and then to deliver a totally headline worthy set. Thank you, lads.

I had half an eye on seeing Haggard Cat in the Forest, but instead scored an excellent sausage (not a euphemism, thank you) from Happy Bangers before heading back to the campsite for Dave McPherson of InMe over on the Camp Frabbit stage conveniently opposite my tent and camping chair.

I went down to Camp Turner for another dose of Buds. – still going strong after their 11am main stage opener and Dan’s voice holding on thanks to lozenges. A fun-filled, cover version smattered, can-chugging, bubble-dominated set followed and it was absolutely worth staying up for.

Buds. on the Camp Turner stage – Credit Summer Festival Guide

If you’ve never ventured out to the stages in the general camping area, I can honestly say I’ve seen some of my favourite performances out there in recent years, so it’s well worth the explore.

With a second (actually, more like seventh) wind now upon me it was time to give the Silent Disco my attention. What I didn’t intend was to be returning to my tent at 3:30am nearly voiceless but with cheeks hurting from smiling so hard. Was it worth it? Abso-bloody-lutely.

FRIDAY

Waking up only a few hours after I fell asleep the heat was feeling extra spicy today and the combination with a fuzzy head was less than pleasant. My own supply of lozenges came to the party to help tackle the hoarse voice, but again – worth it.

Despite the hangover’s grip on very soul, I dragged myself and pals into the sanctuary of the Forest for the 11:30am performance from local lads, Truck.

Truck – Credit Summer Festival Guide

I have to confess to being a massive Truck fanboy and I have no problem outing myself from the off! Their 90’s influenced sound knits alternative rock, country, emo and pop together into the most comfortable (and stylish) sweater you could imagine…the kind that gets you compliments wherever you go.

Hailing from just down the road in Cheltenham, there is a partisan gathering in the audience ready to see the long-time attendees and frequenters of the campsite stages in action on the bill proper for the first time. Their enthusiasm led to a dusty circle pit, sing-a-longs and plenty of smiles.

Having spent part of 2025 in the recording studio, the lads have released two singles so far this year (‘A Little Bit of Love’ and ‘Your Life & Mine’) both of which showcase frontmen Jamie and Dom’s gorgeous harmonies and fondness for a gut punch lyric.

Their cover of Metallica’s ‘Enter Sandman’ is genuinely brill, completely changing the song from a brooding metal track into an upbeat, summer-y tune. It’s a gleeful set and they’re clearly touched by the support from the crowd. You can’t help but root for them and their love for 2000Trees is clear to see. Here’s hoping they get another rung up the ladder next year.

Twat Union – Credit Joe Singh @snaprockandpop

Over to the main stage it was Twat Union, a “feminist-punk-pop six-piece”. Introducing their post-coital lament, ‘UTI’, frontwoman Kate MacDonald removes her shorts to reveal underwear with flames on the front (stylish and informative) before the middle finger to sexists ‘Singer of the Band’ brings the set to a close.

I needed to eat something to try and fight back at the hangover, so a Spring Roll Bowl for a deeply reasonable £6 from the Pad Thai stall got things rolling (arf, arf).

I drifted across to Axiom for a snippet of Grandma’s House and brief respite from the sun and enjoyed Yasmin Berndt’s Brodie Dalle-esque vocals and the sinister basslines and jagged guitars while lying on my back and nursing an ice cold beer.

Then it was back to the furnace for Leeds’ Beauty School for a hearty slug of Midwest-emo that rallies me from the pits of despair. It’s a hot auld set, but for a short period of time a cloud earns itself the title of “hero of the weekend” for blocking the sun.

RIP Cloud, we knew you so briefly – Credit Summer Festival Guide

The respite was insufficient though, and so I headed campsite-wards to get into the welcome gloom of my tent for a wee while before a sojourn to Word for something completely different in TV Party Tonight, a TV theme tune covers band.

They delivered flawless renditions of The Office (US), Peep Show, Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles and (my personal favourite) The OC themes among others and it was a fun-filled alternative to my original plans. It’s always the things you least expect.

Next up was Saturdays At Your Place in the Cave. Of all the bands I listened to in the build-up, these guys were among the ones I was most looking forward to seeing in action.

Hailing from Michigan, the three-piece specialise in that technical Midwest emo guitar sound that has become so synonymous with Trees (and my Spotify wrapped). Fan favourite ‘tarot cards’ is the embodiment of that with the lyrics “She said her friends don’t like me. Well I don’t like, me too.” encapsulating the awkward, youthful angst so associated with the scene.

Saturdays At Your Place – Credit Mac Praed @mac_praed

Other sad bangers ‘it’s always cloudy in kalamazoo’ and ‘future’ feature along with ‘i’d rather be in michigan’ which I would definitely agree with if it was a bit cooler there, but then I wouldn’t be at Trees.

A very short stone’s throw away is Axiom where Free Throw were playing, but again the sauna-like conditions in the tent lost out in favour of time sat in the shade with a pint and some carbs.

This came in the shape of a hefty portion of macaroni cheese with BBQ pulled pork from The Mac Shac (£15). The addition of Sriracha livened me up further still for a quick split of The Wildhearts and the aptly named Sunny Day Real Estate.

Credit Summer Festival Guide

The Wildhearts are elder statesmen of the UK rock scene, led by the ever-present Ginger Wildheart. They were a late addition (not DON BROCO late, but still late) after Lambrini Girls were forced to withdraw following Phoebe Lunny’s brain surgery (get well soon, Phoebe!).

Earlier this year, Ginger announced he had been diagnosed with mantle cell lymphoma, an aggressive form of cancer and was refusing to undergo treatment – preferring instead to spend the next couple of years saying his goodbyes. It’s amazing that he’s doing things on his own terms, and they give the busy Cave tent a proper rock n roll show including ‘I Wanna Go Where the People Go’ and ‘Mazel Tov Cocktail’. It was far too “Meat and Potatoes” for me, but the crowd seemed to have fun!

Down to the main stage next for the driving guitars of Sunny Day Real Estate. The Godfathers of emo have been doing the business since 1992, inspiring countless bands in the process.

Sunny Day Real Estate – Credit Jez Pennington

With over three decades (I felt dirty writing that) of music at their fingertips it’s an enviable task to pick their set. Hearing ‘In Circles’ live was a genuine highlight of the weekend for me, filling this elder emo’s heart to the brim and we still had Funeral for a Friend to come!

There was a definite move by the masses to get food at this point with almost every stall catering to big queues. Although I did have to spare a thought for the team at Crumble…ain’t no-one messing with a crumble in this heat!

Axiom next for Arcane Roots – one of the weekend’s big draws.It’s a good job the set-up crew legends properly nailed down the tent else the roof would be going the same way as yesterday’s umbrella and heading off over the Cotswold hills.

Fans on the barrier for Arcane Roots – Credit Joe Singh @snaprockandpop

The crowd was at fever pitch as the band, who disbanded in 2018, returned to the stage with newest single ‘A Wave, Across the Sea’. Andrew Groves’ voice still soars while the epic soundscapes are all still there. Gentle, melodic build ups reaching epic crescendos and frankly bloody massive drums.

Bidding the crowd adieu (at least until their Forest set on Saturday) they left them wanting more with a stunning ‘If Nothing Breaks, Nothing Moves’. It was a seismic performance and even if the only other opportunity to see them (aside from tomorrow) is currently at ArcTanGent there’ll be hopes for a tour in the not-too-distant future.

Arcane Roots – Credit Carla Mundy

We’re treated to another beaut of a sunset, as the now dusty track lends a hint of Tatooine to this corner of Gloucestershire. I am also treated to another visit to Manjula (what? It’s good!!) and their specials board which this time promises puffed tofu!

Credit Summer Festival Guide

They were only £5.50 and came with a nice tingly sweet chilli sauce (The proper stuff, not the syrup you get in a supermarket) providing the perfect amuse bouche before the main event – Birria Tacos (£14) from Gourmet Warriors.

I try, where possible, not to duplicate meals year on year so as to provide the broadest possible selection of food reviews but I had spent the last 12 months thinking about these tacos and I needed them again.

Delicious beef mixed with cheese and perfectly grilled tacos come with a small pot of beef consommé for dipping and hell’s bells they’re amazing. See you in another year you delicious, delicious wallets of joy.

Credit Summer Festival Guide

And now it was time for our Friday night headliners Funeral for a Friend and I am GIDDY!

They’ve been at it for 25 years now (again, this is a violation), albeit with a few years on hiatus, and long-standing members Kris Roberts, Darran Smith and Ryan Richards are all still going. The vocals are now in the hands of Holding Absence’s Lucas Woodland following Matthew Davies-Kreye’s decision to step away from the band in 2023.

Kicking things off, Woodland announces “We’re Funeral for a Friend and we’re all the rage!” for the Hours LP’s opener of the same name.

Funeral for a Friend – Credit Joe Singh @snaprockandpop

It’s 100mph from the off and it’s immediately into ‘Streetcar’ followed swiftly by ‘Rookie of the Year’ and ‘This Year’s Most Open Heartbreak’. It’s breathless stuff, but Woodland is doing a fine job of fronting the band. Referencing the football and identifying the headliners as being “66 per cent Welsh” (he’s not wrong!) he’s up there living the dream. He’s singing in a band he himself loves as a fan, and is clearly appreciative of the opportunity.

Funeral for a Friend – Credit Mac Praed @mac_praed

It’s never easy being the new guy, but he praises the band for their support and says he’s ready to perform with them for as long as they’ll have him. On the evidence of tonight, he should probably get comfy!

The boys bring out Ben Barlow from Neck Deep for ‘Juneau’ and then it’s a massive singalong (and more than a few tears) for ‘History’ before a brief pause as they leave the stage.

The unmistakeable opening to ‘Into Oblivion (Reunion)’ takes the roof off before Woodland tells the crowd: “Diolch yn Fawr! We’ll be back. Escape artists never die!” giving us one last chance to scream lyrics in the faces of our besties. It’s absolutely everything and my heart is full. Fuller still as the Dafydd Iwan protest anthem ‘Yma o Hyd’ plays out on the PA. Da iawn, boys.

Funeral for a Friend – Credit Mac Paraed @Mac_Praed

I hot footed back to Camp Turner for Truck’s second set of the day and this time they’re rolling with a freakin’ banjo along with Joe from Lickshot filling in on cajon.

With heavy footfall passing the lads had the opportunity to woo some new fans, with passers by stopping to listen in to another excellent performance. There’s no such thing as too much Truck in my opinion (and clearly in the organisers’ opinion too with three bands featuring the word Truck!).

Truck on the Camp Turner stage – Credit Summer Festival Guide

A stop off at the tent to pick up Silent Disco headphones and it was into the Forest for Battlesnake.

The Australian rockers tore the place up last year and they were back for more, along with a Saturday main stage slot. It was time to convert some non-believers!

Battlesnake Silent Disco set – Credit Jez Pennington

After the customary spoken-word introduction of ‘Dawn of the Exultants’ frontman Sam Frank announces: “We are Battlesnake. And we are playing silently!” and it’s into ‘I Killed Satan’.

It’s absolutely surreal to watch them in action but in silence, especially after their batshit set in the same location during daylight hours last year. I’m not sure it worked, but with another show to come they would have their chance.

Credit Jez Pennington

A brief stop off in the Silent Disco was cut short when I ended up spilling the White Russian, I was carrying in my pocket down my shorts and boxers and I had to go back to the tent to change. Which, serendipitously, meant I was in prime location for Buds.’ Camp Frabbit show.

There were definitely over 100 people gathered around for the performance, which they introduced as “The hits!”. We got huge singalongs to their own material, especially for ‘Building Blocks’ but were also treated to excellent covers of Natasha Beddingfield’s ‘Unwritten’, Sugababes’ ‘About You Now’, Bowling for Soup (‘Girl All the Bad Guys Want’) and ‘Complicated’ by Avril Lavigne.

Buds. on the Camp Frabbit stage – Credit Summer Festival Guide

It was an hour of pure joy and the balloons, circle pits, people on shoulders and crowd surfers made for one of the best campsite shows I’ve seen to date.

At the same time over near the Forest, it was time for the annual dose of the obscure as Not a Carrot Cult reaped the rewards of a bountiful harvest (“Blessed Be!”) – possibly their largest crop to date.

Half village fete vegetable growing competition, half sing-a-long, it’s all bonkers – and it’s an absolute highlight.

The ceremony was punctuated by veg themed songs such as ‘Sow Me Now’ (to the tune of Creed’s One Last Breath) and ‘Carrots Gonna Grow’ in the style of ‘Three Lions’ and forays into terrace chants showing love for carrots (“We love you carrots, we do”) and disdain for parsnips (“What do we think of parsnips? Shit!”). It’s one of the most bizarre aspects of 2000Trees and it’s bloody excellent – “Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

SATURDAY

We’re running on fumes at this point and so there’s a more relaxed start to proceedings and a couple of coffees at the campsite before attacking the day.

On the Camp Frabbit stage we got an unexpected early performance, as a man from a nearby tent got on stage to shower while his friends played Def Leppard’s ‘Pour Some Sugar on Me’ on a speaker. The guy had some serious moves and will undoubtedly be taking calls ahead of next year’s event…that or from folk of ill repute.

Trees regulars The Xcerts were taking part in a Q&A over in the Forest, so we headed there first of all. The Scottish band were playing the Cave stage later on, but there’s nothing wrong with double The Xcerts.

The XCerts Q&A session with Mark & Me – Credit Gareth Bull @garethbull.co

That being said, while Murray’s solo set (including ‘Do It to Myself’ and ‘losing it’) was great, there was a bit too much Q&A for my liking – so we left in search of breakfast.

Catching the end of breakfast service meant options were thinning out, but my heroes over at Gourmet Warriors had some leftover Breakfast Tacos (three for £11.50)! What a result!! They were incredible and I will definitely be attempting to make them myself at home. Corn tortillas stuffed with spiced sausage meat, scrambled egg and melted cheese – served with salsa.

Credit Summer Festival Guide

While eating we caught some of Frozemode on the main stage with what I have decided to dub ‘roadman rock’. It wasn’t my bag, but they were well up for it and those who enjoyed it had a silent disco set to look forward to (after the football).

A cold, refreshing Helles lager in hand I wandered across to Lakes in Axiom for more of that Midwestern emo I love so much!

They’re from the UK but their influences are worn squarely on their sleeves with a set of really tight American Football-referencing indie. They’ve toured with acts such as Pedro the Lion and The Get Up Kids – similar exponents of the multi-layered indie style of music. It’s a fantastic set and they’re a group I’ll be keeping my eye out for.

The main stage once more and it’s the return of Battlesnake! The surreal silent disco set behind them, this time it’s for real and it’s time to get loud. They get the crowd involved, with a kid on shoulders shouting “2000!” into the mic and the crowd responding with “Trees!”. It’s core memory territory and might be the beginning of a journey toward rock superstardom for the young lad.

Seth leads the crowd in a chant during Battlesnake – Credit Jez Pennington

White robes are soon removed and it’s into budgie smugglers (they’re aussies, okay?) as frontman Sam Frank informs the crowd after every song “Thank you we are Battlesnake!”. He also tells the watching throng “We’ve got one more for you” which he repeats at least three times so I honestly couldn’t tell you how many songs there were.

Battlesnake – Credit Jez Pennington

If you have FOMO reading this, or you were there and just wanting to relive everything (or in my case remind myself), you can watch it all again on the band’s YouTube! They’re fun as hell and I love ‘em.

Another of those acts my pre-festival research flagged up was Bicurious. Having already been given one dose of Ireland’s new wave of alternative bands, I was thirsty for more.

Bicurious – Credit Summer Festival Guide

Bicurious is the Dublin-based duo of Gavin Purcell and Taran Plouzané. Describing themselves as “Two sweaty boys playing tunes and giving it loads” they’re doing themselves a bit of a disservice. It’s not an inaccurate statement by any stretch – but there’s heaps more to them than that.

Purcell is part drummer, part hype man and spends his time leaping off stage into the crowd, encouraging a circle pit and as much moshing as possible. Plouzané keeps the momentum going with looped riffs and when they let rip, boy do they let rip!

They’re on the Marshall Stage this year, but given the response to their set I reckon they’re good for a bigger space next time around.

The Seal of Approval is even there! NB: I previously stated the Seal had a red light AND a green light, which was clearly a Freudian slip into Squid Games territory. It only has a red light (currently) although the Seal’s keepers were considering the upgrade for next year.

The motherflippin’ Seal of Approval – Credit Summer Festival Guide

On the Seal, I finally received the flipper up I had so yearned for (and a bit of a bruised jaw) as I was made to kneel and “Receive the Seal”. It was absolutely worth it.

The annual live edition of the 2 Promoters 1 Pod (starring James Scarlett and Gavin McInally) is taking place over in the Word tent and is once again totally packed (Axiom next year?) despite the tent being given an extension this year.

Arriving on stage, Gavin appeared as James – holding an England flag. He soon switched into his Scotland shirt though and is probably still washing his hands…

Over in Axiom, Baltimore’s Have Mercy inform the audience that this is only their third time visiting the UK three times ever. Their earnest, elder-emo soothing sound is another highlight of the weekend.

Have Mercy – Credit Jez Pennington

Although they strayed into the classic pitfall of commenting on the actual number of trees at 2000Trees (“There are 2,220 – the name’s misleading!”) the set is awesome. ‘Coexist’, ‘Two Years’, ‘Let’s Talk About Your Hair’ and the stunning ‘Cigarettes and Old Perfume’ give the Axiom crowd a dose of exactly what we want.

Thanking the crowd, they say: “This has been the best show of our life”. You can’t helped be touched by their obvious pride at what they’ve just delivered and it’s a feeling very much reciprocated.

I headed over to the Word tent for The Ogretones, the UK’s number one musical tribute to the greatest film soundtracks of all time – Shrek. Yes, that’s right the Shrek films.

The group, dressed as much-loved characters from the film franchise (including Donkey on bass, the Big Bad Wolf on drums, the Gingerbread Man on keyboard) play songs from the Shrek soundtrack including ‘Accidentally in Love’, ‘All Star’, ‘I’m A Believer’ and “Holding Out for a Hero”

The Ogretones – Credit Summer Festival Guide

Shrek (well, the singer with Shrek ears and a bright green guitar) comments that “We’ve never had a circle pit before…” and as the riff from Led Zepellin’s ‘Immigrant Song’ starts they get their wish. Gentle though it is, it’s unmistakably a circle pit and there is joy on the faces of everyone involved!

These guys hit the absolute sweet spot for a festival populated with millennials. Loads of them grew up watching the films and now they have kids of their own who watch the films. The booking is inspired and there are no glum faces as we make our way back out into the sun.

On the subject of fancy dress (seamless right?) this year’s theme was 2000memes.

The creativity of Trees attendees is a joy to behold. We had a brilliant couple as the ‘This is Fine’ dog surrounded by fire, an incredible recreation of the iconic Pepe Silva scene from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Spidermen(people?) pointing at one another, a cat playing piano, a whole “I can haz cheeseburger? stall and the individual prize winner an interactive ‘Distracted Boyfriend’ stand.

Winners of the couples fancy dress competition – Credit Magda Campagne
Runner up and winners of the solo category – Credit Magda Campagne

It was time to visit the legends at Bunnymans Bunnychow for my annual pilgrimage. The hollowed-out bread, filled with chilli combo is an absolute winner whatever the weather. However, my plan to keep it 50/50 spice wise was thwarted by some gentle piss taking by the staff and so I caved under pressure and went for hot. This turned out to be a mistake when my core temperature was already at critical levels, but I regret nothing. It was delicious – and the pint of Westons cider offset the spice perfectly.

Credit Summer Festival Guide

Marmozets are back! Having stepped away from music in 2018 they returned with their first new release ‘CO.WAR.DICE.’ in May and have played seven headline shows across the UK prior to festival season.

One of the reasons they called it a day seven years ago was frontwoman Becca Bottomley’s pregnancy leading to the band being told no label would sign them as a result! Well, here they are, back at it, signed to Nettwerk and Bottomley is 30 weeks pregnant! It’s a triumphant middle finger up to the naysayers all those years ago – and they’re playing like they never left.

Marmozets – Credit Gareth Bull @garethbull.co

Their set is understandably pock marked with new ones (‘A Kiss From A Mother’, ‘Cut Back’ and ‘Like Last Night’ standouts) but the old stuff gets the most love. The bassline for ‘Captivate You’ has my sternum aching and ending their set on an utterly exhilerating ‘Major System Error’, Marmozets have lit the touch paper and Trees is all the better for it.

The heat was kicking the shit out of me at this point (both temperature and spice wise) and with a long one in the offing it was time to retreat back to the tent for a wardrobe change and a litre of electrolytes. As the designated “bag man” for Neck Deep, I’m left in charge of the silent disco headphones (along with other valuables) while the others go into the pit. Thankfully I have a freshly screen-printed tote bag from the Marshall Tent to store them in.

I drifted back into the arena, hearing The Xcerts (part deux) packing out the Cave for their play through of the fresh off the presses ‘i think i want to go home now.’ but carry on down to the main stage for Glassjaw.

The elder statesmen of post-hardcore hadn’t played Trees before and there was a huge amount of excitement among the crowd and bands on the bill alike. Their fingerprints are all over Funeral for a Friend for example, and their influence on the scene can’t be ignored.

Glassjaw – Credit Joe Singh @snaprockandpop

Anthems from 2002’s Worship and Tribute (‘Pink Roses’, ‘Cosmopolitan Blood Loss’, ‘Tip Your Bartender’ and ‘Ape Dos Mil’) figure heavily in the setlist but I’ll be honest I found myself losing interest so headed back up to The XCerts and caught the end of their set, including the certified banger ‘Feels Like Falling In Love’. There are emotional scenes amongst the audience and I start to feel like I made the wrong choice…Oh well!

Dinosaur Pile Up are on in the Axiom next and despite it being mere yards away there is no chance of getting in there as the place is PACKED. This is in no small part due to the gigantic inflatable dinosaurs in the pit, but as we all know “Nature finds a way!”

A literal Dinosaur Pile-Up at Dinosaur Pile-Up – Credit Carla Mundy

There’s plenty of the set occupied by tracks from the new record, ‘I’ve Felt Better’, including ‘Bout to Lose It’, ‘Sick of Being Down’ and most recent single ‘Love’s The Worst’ and they’re all well received. As are the classics – especially the impossibly funky ‘Back Foot’ which draws things to a close. It’s great seeing them back in action and with November dates covering Spain and Italy there’s hope for UK dates in the New Year.

Dusk settles in and here come Neck Deep, the final third of the Wales dominated headliner slots closing things out with a set filled with arms aloft pop punk anthems.

Neck Deep’s Ben Barlow – Credit Gareth Bull @garethbull.co

‘Can’t Kick Up The Roots’ opens things up and sets the tempo for the next 120 minutes of their set. Greeting the crowd, Ben Barlow acknowledges the upcoming match – promising that they were: “Going to try and rattle through this!”

The sampled intro of Where Do We Go When We Go’ with the playschool chant of “Rain, Rain, Go Away” was met with a pleading shout of “Come Back!” from frontman Ben and a setlist ticking off most eras of the band follows.

I reckon there’s a fair few in the crowd who had no idea Neck Deep were from North Wales. Despite the recent US focus on Wrexham thanks to Messrs Mac and Reynolds, you’d definitely not assume they’re from that part of the world! Still, Ben’s transatlantic vocal has undoubtedly helped them to enjoy success both here and across the pond!

Introducing ‘When You Know’ Ben asks the crowd: “Anyone here in love? Probably not. You’re all Neck Deep fans so you’re all miserable”. Following that theme he then dedicates their newest song (‘You Should See Me Now’) to those in the audience who have “been through some stuff”.

Neck Deep – Credit Gareth Bull @garethbull.co

We get a Christmas song (‘December’) in July and then things end on a massive sing-a-long ‘In Bloom’ which has been an earworm ever since. It has been a triumphant showing from the Neck Deep boys and a fine closer to the music for the weekend.

Then it’s the football…if you’re of that persuasion. James Scarlett told the 2 Promoters 1 Podcast audience they’d paid £5k to install a big screen to show the second half of the England Vs Norway match. It’s always one of those big dividers in that keeping the focus on the music is the priority – as Download did. But with so many football shirts around and the opportunity for a communal experience, there was little doubt Trees would deliver.

I meet friends down at Barnaby Sykes Pie Maker just in front of the bug screen, and with it being a football match raid their dwindling supplies for a final festival feast with a steak and chorizo pie, chips (they’d run out of mash) and gravy. It was pretty meh. But Bovril was in short supply.

There were a couple of teething issues with the screen initially, but it was soon rectified and considering we’re in the middle of a field where there’s no signal the fact they managed to stream it at all is impressive!

Credit Summer Festival Guide

Silent disco headsets allowed those desiring to listen to the dulcet tones of Sam Matterface and Lee Dixon, while everyone else could either switch over to the DJ sets (including Cheltenham’s own DJ Aces High spinning power ballads – RIP Bonnie Tyler – and epic 2Pigs club night If Only We Could Fly).

It was a surreal experience watching along with thousands of others wearing headsets, and even though it carried on into extra-time and nerves were jangling, England’s win sent the crowd into raptures.

The red channel DJ immediately queued up Fat Les’ ‘Vindaloo’ before ‘Three Lions’ got the first of possibly 700 plays that night across various channels, phones and Bluetooth speakers. At one point, sandwiched between the hoards making their way out of the main arena, I had to crank up the volume on literally any other channel to avoid the sing-a-long.

It was euphoria for England fans, but it was my queue to return the headphones and head back to my tent and out of earshot! Yes, that meant I missed out on the gazebo in the pit during the silent disco, but I am content with my decision and it made the early get up to pack down more palatable than if I was fighting for my life.

A slightly different conclusion to proceedings at Upcote Farm, but I am sure the bars were given an absolute pasting which would have gone some way to offsetting the cost of the big screen. You wouldn’t have blamed James Scarlett for not pandering to the football crowd – but it would have been an own goal if people made their way off site early and were spending their money in Cheltenham town centre instead. Total no brainer.

It’s the hope that kills you…England fans celebrate the win over Norway – Credit Summer Festival Guide

SUNDAY – OUTRO

And just like that it’s Sunday morning and the festival is over for another year, leaving Upcote Farm to heal and its temporary residents to take their sun ravaged bodies back to “real life”.

Due to some poor coordination on our part, we didn’t leave site until after midday – but that actually meant the exit was a lot more straight forward than previous years as the vast majority of folk had left already. So, while yes, I could have been home at least two hours earlier – not being sat in a boiling hot car for an hour was definitely a win.

So how do we assess 2000Trees 2026? Heatwave conditions, last minute cancellations, spiralling costs, unexpected football success – it wasn’t without its variables! But they managed to navigate all of that and deliver yet another masterclass.

They manage all this despite (or perhaps because of?) being independent. A small team delivering the absolute best week of the year for 15,000 people year in year out. They carry the burden on their shoulders and thrive under it.

Credit 2000Trees

They have carefully selected commercial partners like Marshall, Arbor and Westons and there’s a great synergy between them all. Trees also makes an effort to provide spaces to charities such as Metal for Good, Head Above the Waves and Radical plus the annual charity of the year. They’re doing good while delivering excellent. Long may that continue.

Trees’ sister festival ArcTanGent has just announced it’ll be relocating but it feels like 2000Trees and Upcote Farm are a match made in heaven…even if there’s “Not enough shade” and only a tiny road on and off site…

It is always a pleasure to be on the farm and I am sure I speak for everyone when I say “Thank you” to the organisers, the staff and the volunteers who bring this gorgeous community together each year and never, ever miss.

2000Trees 2027 takes place from Thursday 9th to Saturday 11th July and will mark 20 years since the festival started. Tickets are already on sale, with a 30% discount until the end of this week – so move fast!

As of Wednesday evening, organisers said they had sold “as many tickets in the last 72 hours as we did for all of 2026!” which is absolutely insane! The show of faith from attendees is in no small part down to the incredible work done by the organisers to create a perfect corner of the world – especially when so much of it is a total hellscape.

It’s no surprise considering they’ve billed next year’s edition as a “20th Anniversary Special” and responding to the rush on tickets they said: “It…give us the confidence and resources to book the best lineup we possibly can when folks lock in so early”.

That’s an exciting prospect and considering James Scarlett managed to pull DON BROCO into a headline slot with mere hours’ notice, you best believe there’s something epic coming next year!

Whatever it is, you can safely assume they will be going ALL OUT on the line up! If you need convincing to book your ticket, I hope this review has helped! See you at the Taco stand!

Credit Jez Pennington

Kelburn Garden Party 2026

The boat on the hill

Kelburn Garden Party is unequivocally the best small festival in Britain (even the world): a hidden gem on the west coast of Scotland that exceeds expectations year after year. Its first outstanding feature is its location. Nestled in the Kelburn Estate, with its 1,000-year-old trees, waterfalls and idyllic views over the islands of Cumbrae and Arran, there are few festivals that can compete with walking through the surroundings of one of the oldest and most colourful castles in Scotland. Art exhibitions pepper the “Neverending Glen”, and the Thursday before the festival began in earnest was the perfect time for a sunny sneak peek at Kirsten Tingle’s eerie human mycelium sculptures (which had bulbously bloomed by the end of the festival) and Neve Pearce’s interactive tree puppet, Gronto.

Kirsten Tingle's mycelium sculptures

Kelburn’s equally exceptional feature is, of course, its music: perfectly curated stages around the beautiful site bristling with every imaginable genre. With Friday afternoon remaining clear, a hike up to the Boat on the Hill stage was a must. Dancing to Glasgow DJ duo Lezzer Quest’s queer electro euphoria while gazing out across the Firth of Clyde on a giant tugboat is an unusual thrill. New stage Giant’s Castle, set in the grounds of the Secret Forest (a children’s maze like no other), was spookily spectacular, as Italo house DJ Peeve set the ramparts alight. While Kelburn is well known for its EDM, rock and punk have started to make more of an appearance. The main Square stage welcomed Edinburgh funk rockers Bikini Body and eco-punk outlanders Snapped Ankles, both of whom never fail to win over a crowd. Meanwhile, the Skinny’s Pyramid stage hosted breakout punk grungers Soapbox for the best mosh pits of the festival, as bodies slid around (safely!) in the gathering mud to “Private Public Transport Sucks!”.

Soapbox at the Pyramid

But the wildest moment came when live techno ravers Dogshow, while playing synth and drums in a cart-cage, asked the crowd to spin them around. The result was bizarre: two circle pits erupted around the moving cage, a chaotic human whirlpool that even the band themselves hadn’t anticipated. A chiller time was had with alt-trap Glasgow DJ Iso Yso, who kept the Saloon raving amid Wild West-themed children’s slides. At the Landing – Kelburn’s largest stage for dance music – Jen Cardini’s global beats blew revellers away, from the front of the stage all the way to the colossal log that provides the perfect vantage point of the dancefloor.

Saturday dawns somewhat wetly, so Glasgow DJs Duende and their tropical reggaeton at the Boat are the perfect rejoinder, unless you’re waylaid first by Mungo’s Hi Fi’s incredible secret set in the small surroundings of the Hometown Corner jungle tent. The furthest-away stage in the glen, the Beech Plateau, is the next place to catch techno legend Neil Templar, despite stomping in deep mud to get there.

The Beech plateau

Coming down from the glen, it would usually be time for a swim, as the deep pools littered along the river (the Kel Burn) are a haven for wild swimmers. This year, the wild weather (caused by two heatwaves either side of the festival that turned the estate from a temperate to a tropical rainforest) means the river is too high for such shenanigans. But despite this, the spirit of Kelburn never dampens.

That spirit is awoken once more when Joshua Idehen, the standout new act of the festival, makes his debut. Political spoken word overlaying house beats (alongside eclectic dance moves that keep the crowd engaged and dancing throughout) is a tricky balance to strike without instruments or even much singing. Idehen, however, does not blink, cruising through his set. “Your Mum Does the Washing” is the absolute highlight, but his crowd-pleasing Talking Heads cover of “Once in a Lifetime” gets hips shaking too.

Other Saturday night-time highlights include indie rockers Tina Sandwich, brass beauties Esa’s Afro-Synth Band at the Viewpoint — another jaw-droppingly pretty stage — and, amusingly, Folkcore DJs at Sheela’s Tent, who fuse happy hardcore with Celtic favourites like “Rattlin’ Bog”; very appropriate for the bog encroaching outside said tent.

Sunday squelches into view with little let-up from the rain, which means it’s time to explore all the wonderful indoor places Kelburn has to offer, including cabaret and music tents, cafés (with real toilets!), and the Blundabus. In the early afternoon, the Blundabus is an unhinged jam tent where shelterers from the rain are press-ganged into playing instruments they don’t know how to hold. This chaos is charming, as one punter sings in an operatic voice: “We’re all in a jacuzzi, we don’t care about the weather…”

Meanwhile, baile funk DJs Femme45’s uplifting rhythms and Bemz’s talented hip-hop are the perfect way to enjoy the sliver of sun on offer later. Sunday night is folk night at Kelburn, meaning anyone who leaves early has sorely missed out on some of the most innovative trad tunes on offer. Here, electro-trad act Valtos are the stand-outs of the festival, drawing a packed-out Square stage as it pours with rain – no easy feat, as shown by how this poor reporter’s phone got so wet during the set that it broke and left them without one for a week! Valtos’s Celtic EDM though never lets up throughout. Perhaps the band had planned to play slower, haunting songs like “Beinn” about reclaiming the Gaelic language, but seeing the rain they went high-energy from the start, with “Ceòl Dannsa” and Peatbog Faeries’ electro-trad cover “Marx Terrace” sending the crowd bouncing. With plenty of shout-outs to the Scottish energy of partying despite the weather, and the world, it was the perfect way to end the main stage.

But Sunday’s other standout act had to be Huartan in Sheela’s. A radical Irish Heilung, fusing Celtic paganism with electronica, this act is a festival must, and one to watch. Finally, is it really a Scottish festival if Mungo’s Hi Fi don’t close it out? Ending by mixing “Rules of the Dance” with Fatboy Slim’s “Born Slippy”, the soundsystem crew never disappoint, and never fail to leave us wanting more.

It was a cruel twist of fate that the first sell-out Kelburn since before the pandemic was also the wettest Kelburn for many years. But the organisers, the bands and the ticket holders refused to let that spoil another magical revel in the glen. In Joshua Idehen’s words: “Don’t let it get you down” — and no one did. One festival-goer (just returned from a sweltering festival on the continent) remarked upon how preferential the rain was to the heatstroke-inducing conditions seen abroad, where bands play during the day to a few people huddled in a tiny bit of shade. With the climate oscillating between a burning laser in the sky and monsoon season, you could do far worse than visiting a shady forest on the west coast of Scotland for an amazing time with the most indomitable people.

Yes, we have our tickets for next year already.

2000Trees Update – Don Broco confirmed as new Thursday headliners!

Who’d be a festival organiser, eh?

Well James Scarlett organises two – 2000Trees and ArcTanGent – so he’s clearly a glutton for punishment, but even he must have had a bit of a wobble on Friday evening when Alkaline Trio announced they were having to withdraw from the rest of their UK tour less than a week before their Thursday night headline slot.

In a statement on Instagram, the band said:

We are immensely sorry but we must cancel our dates in England, including tonight’s show in Birmingham, due to medical issues Matt has been suffering from that have worsened. He’s gonna be okay but needs to be treated stateside as soon as possible.

We will be back healthier and stronger!

Skiba then followed up with his own video from a hotel at Heathrow Airport, apologising and updating fans on his condition, saying: “I got numbness in my feet, numbness in my hands, as you can tell I’m losing my voice so I can’t really talk, walk, play or sing. But I’m OK. I’m just a little tuned up but I’m gonna go home and get looked at and we’ll be back as soon as we can.”

Responding to the news in pretty much real-time, the 2000Trees team posted a statement of their own:

We’re gutted that Alkaline Trio will no longer be able to make it to 2000Trees next week, but health comes first and we wish the band the best – we know this won’t be an easy decision they’ve taken lightly.

We will have more news about a replacement as soon as possible. We’re actively working on getting something awesome for you all, and you’ll be the first to know – stay tuned for more info soon.

Speculation (or hopeful delusion?) filled social media as fans pondered who would step in at such short notice. Bands currently touring including Enter Shikari, Frank Turner, unpeople, Skindred, Knocked Loose and perhaps most delusional of all – My Chemical Romance.

Having already delved into the little black book to replace Lambrini Girls with The Wildhearts after Phoebe Lunny underwent surgery to deal with an acute brain injury which forced them to cancel Coachella, it was all hands on deck.

Shining the proverbial Bat Signal into the sky, James Scarlett’s call for help was answered within hours…but by who?

Fresh off the stage at Finsbury Park as part of their support slot for Biffy Clyro, the men from Don Broco checked their voicemails they said yes!

Having closed out 2024’s festival with an incendiary set (literally, they had fireworks and everything!) there is little doubt of the Bedford band’s ability to deliver the goods and the reactions on social media were full of celebrations. Updating the fans on the official trees app, organisers said:

Amazing news for you this gloriously sunny evening!

The one & only Don Broco have literally saved the day & will now be headlining the Thursday of 2000trees. This comes after today’s announcement from Alkaline Trio, who unfortunately now can’t make it.

We’re super happy that Don Broco are returning to 2000trees after a barn storming show back in 2024 and we’re massively grateful to their (& our) whole team for pulling this out of the bag at such short notice. What a result!!!

Lots of praise was rightly poured on Mr Scarlett and the Trees team for their swift actions and delivering, arguably, a bigger headliner with such short notice. The collective exhale from Upcote Farm could be heard from the N4 postcode! Hats off to the team.

Top 7 2000Trees Festival Side Quests – 2026

2000Trees is just a week away and we are officially into the “Ultimate Trees Excitement” phase of the build-up timeline.

Group chats are filled with screenshots of the clashfinder, the official Facebook groups are filled with sensible (and the not so sensible) questions, and all around the absolute fear of another heatwave striking is palpable. It’s Treesmas, baby – and we are STOKED!

We’ve all got those bands we are desperate to see (Truck 4 eva), the food stalls we we’re gagging to re-visit (I see you Bunnymans Bunnychow) and the beverages we want to consume (remember “Heroes Buy Beeros”, folks!). But how else are we going to fill the time?

Never fear, Summer Festival Guide has got you covered with a list of stuff you could stumble into, basically a choose your own adventure…It’s time to embrace the festival side quest!

  • 1. Not so Silent Disco: The last band is finished, it’s back to the tent…OR IS IT? If you’ve got the stamina a whole new night begins with the move to the Silent Disco. DJs galore, killer sets, Immaculate vibes, genuinely excellent signal strength and all you need is a pair of headphones! Book ahead, pick up your headphones as soon as your tent is set up and get ready to make friends for the weekend as you scream lyrics at one another and bond with strangers over your ability to communicate requests to DJs via mime alone. Realistically, you’ll be able to hear everyone singing along from your tent anyway – so why not get involved?
  • 2. The night ain’t over ‘til it’s over!: Following on from the above, some of the best times at Trees are had out in the General Camping area where stages (or busk boxes as they’re known) are set up for musicians to perform between guy lines and the occasional percussive snorers. Acapella singalongs with performers from the day, along with busking sets from up and comers you might see on the main stage in years to come make for a fun ‘nightcap’ and it’s on the way back to your tent, what’s not to love? Set times have been published on the social media channels of Camp Turner, Camp Frabbit and Under the Bridge (UTB) – so you can plot your course ahead of time and squeeze every drop out of the night! (Pssssst – Secret sets frequently take place out there so keep your ears to the ground…)
  • 3. Campsite Shenanigans: The campsites aren’t just for laying awake while a bloke with a snore like a chainsaw, fights for their life in a neighbouring tent. Nor are they just for waking up freezing at 4am, putting on all your layers and then at 8am screaming because it’s too hot and you’re now slicker than an otter’s pocket. Nope. At Trees, the campsite delivers more than you thought possible! The ever-present heroes at Camp Kev (their site is located at the What3Words of Absolute.Festival.Legends.) will return with their painted rock hunts, beer pong, games, quizzes and life-saving water fights. They bring the vibes to campsite life – even if you’re on the proverbial struggle bus. Grab a slice of watermelon and go say hi! Up in the overflow camping area, just beyond the hedge are the good folk of Camp Gooch. They bring the as yet unrecognised by the International Olympic Committee sport of Lemon Jousting to Upcote Farm as well as open mic sessions, trinket swaps and even pegs (as long as you beg).
  • 4. Join a (Carrot) Cult: Last year a cacophonous Carrot Cult collective rose from the soil of Upcote Farm spreading terror amongst attendees not seen since the great Cockchafer invasion of 2024! Rumours of an Avengers End Game root vegetable battle royale have been rife (“Fuck the Parsnips!”) while organisers have refused to confirm or deny whether members of the set-up crew have been disappearing suspiciously in the lead up to Trees. What is clear is they are making a return, with a message of: “We are one. We are many” and the harvest reveal imminent. Hold on to your butts, and don’t mention crudites…
  • 5. Count the Trees (gags): Some bands are better at the stage patter than others, it’s true. Some mumble “this is a new one”, some fire out a pre-rehearsed set of one liners, some use their platform to discuss socio-political matters, others to bemoan their journey – or how they got the shits from service station food en route. One of the go-to observational “humour” comments is invariably about the actual number of trees at 2000Trees. Something like “I was up all last night counting and only saw 963” or similar. You may chuckle gently the first time you hear it, but by Saturday you’ll be into slow clap or deep groan mode as the novelty factor evaporates before you like all those delicious White Russians from the night before…
  • 6. Sacrifice yourself to the fancy dress overlords: Trees always has a fancy-dress theme and this year it’s 2000memes – a celebration of the zeitgeist and an opportunity to dredge up some really deep cuts from those early meme days before Pepe was co-opted by right wingers, and Drake hadn’t been dissed by Kendrick Lamar. Last year, despite the absolute furnace-like conditions, costumes were donned by many on the Saturday making for an eclectic game of Guess Who? with the winners of the competition receiving a free ticket to next year’s festival. The skill and creativity on show is always incredible so the judges have a tough gig! There’ll also undoubtedly be returns for the regular triumvirate of Trees Santa, Tigger and Jesus (Treesus?) so if you’re inclined to whip up an ensemble then now’s the time…Papier-mâché dries quicker when it’s warm!

NB: Summer Festival Guide takes no responsibility for any physical effects suffered by getting into a cheap polyester costume that boils your insides like Haggis…

  • 7. Receive the Seal of Approval: This one has thus far eluded me (hint) but no matter how many stars a reviewer gives a band for their performance – the one true arbiter of judgement is the Seal of Approval. The Seal (a cuddly toy, relax) sits atop an extendable pole, with a light fitted to it either turning red or green depending on whether you’ve done good in the eyes of the Seal or need to get in the sea! Bands may regard the Main Stage as the pinnacle of a weekend at Trees, but secretly they all yearn for that flippers up from the furry wee Seal of Approval!

That should be more than enough stuff to get you going, but remember – the best adventures are the ones you never prepare for, so keep your eyes and ears open for anything that sounds like it might be worth retelling over the next few decades of your life…

Eden Festival 2026 – THE BIG REVIEW!

Review by The Punk Buddhist Journalist – Stewart Campbell

Since 2019, Raehills Meadows, near Moffat in Dumfries and Galloway, has been the site of Eden Festival, an independent, not-for-profit celebration of music, arts, and culture.

‘Showcasing both internationally acclaimed artists as well as local up-and-coming acts, from Folk, Soul and Electronica to Jazz, Rockabilly, World and everything in between. With more than 250 acts over 10 stages.’

Jude Norton-Smith at Rabbie’s Tavern is my first port of call. As I walk towards the entrance, a delicate, tender, nurturing music hastens me in.

Jude’s recent EP, “I’ve Seen a Many Strange Things”, played in full, works as an enchanting, enriching overture for the many strange and wonderful things one can and may hope to encounter at this now 18-year-old festival.

Jude Norton-Smith

“I’d describe my music as alt-folk. It’s tender music, full of love and light and mischief while also occasionally swelling into a beautiful chaotic racket.

“We’ve now got this beautiful strange elastic band, and I think we’re all pretty logged onto this shared folkish musical world.

“We’re all using the language and sounds of folk music to give it this really live and embodied feeling – it feels very human and joyous. I’m inspired by nature and the natural world, but recently I’ve found the music I’ve written has had this extra layer of memory on top. like remembering the memory of remembering nature.”

It’s 4:15pm, I sit upon the Good ship Cheesecake that overlooks the cycle-powered Reaction Stage. Newly pressed boot prints lay upon the expectantly muddy footpath and stage front. Sherlock finishes their set; relaxing lo-fi rap beats soothe the transition from reality into the sacred festival site.

You slink along to the Bodega, a hypnotic bar within a permanent wooden structure.

Old-time swing music plays subtly in the background. I feel a swell of nostalgia for a time period outwith my own.

My inner Holden Caulfield is awakened as I sit at the back and survey the scene. The prices are reasonable… if you’re rich, which I’m not. I’m not complaining, there will be someone who can afford the drinks at festivals, but it’s not me. A wall-mounted arrow points towards a DJ booth with a neon “Desiato” above it. The arrow proclaims, “Make a jazz noise here”.

The Bodega hosts talks, workshops, and in the evening, it becomes an alluring neo-nightclub, like dancing between dreams inside an ultraviolet mood lamp. I remember completely missing this space the first time I came to Eden and stumbling upon it at 1am on my first night of my second time with my friend. We felt like we’d stumbled upon a hidden room in a labyrinth we thought we’d mastered.

Hypnotised by the room, we catch each other’s eyes.

“…I don’t remember this space?”

“Me neither.”

“How could we have missed this?”

“I don’t know.”

“…Is this actually here?”

“I don’t know.”

We looked at the room in silent bewilderment, caught each other’s eyes once more, nodded and left.

Never to speak upon what had changed.

I can now confirm, one year on, that the room is indeed both there and real.

Reality is not all it’s cracked up to be, kids!

I make my way to the main stretch of the land, and I stumble upon the Barrett’s Bananas. Upon graciously receiving a banana, I speak to Captain Banana, Gordon. He tells me the founder of the Barrett’s Bananas, Richard Barrett, passed away in 2020 of Motor Neurone Disease and Eden Festival is always an emotional time as it’s the first festival Richard ever handed out bananas.

What more wholesome and delicious gift could a person receive than human generosity and a banana during a weekend of partying?

So now the Barrett’s Bananas raise money and awareness of Motor Neurone Disease whilst delivering banana-y goodness.

I’ve now used the word banana 9 times in this paragraph, here’s another to make it a round 10: banana.

After my banana (that’s 11 times now), I meet old friends and sit by the Garden Bandstand for our annual catch-up.

Since first going to Eden in 2022, it has been a site of meeting friends old and new. Festivals are the perfect place to meet sandcastle friends (whole, complete friendships formed in brief moments, sharing our hearts one to another, before the tide comes in, the weekend ends, and what once seemed corporeal melts as breath into the wind).

These are my favourite moments. I love the music and the atmosphere, but it’s the quiet conversations, the people, and the openness found in these moments that reinvigorate my soul.

I even once met Jesus here…nice guy.

It’s 7:15pm and Glasgow rockers Telekinephews take the pagoda-shaped Garden Bandstand. With two tracks featured on BBC Introducing, the most recent of which springs forward from the stage with such infectious energy, we cannot help but ponder upon the immortal question posed by singer Joe Miskimmins: “Can you drink 45 pints of fortified wine?”

No sir, I do not believe so, but damn it, I feel an almost patriotic duty to try!

Telekinephews

Joe tells me he’s playing again at the Woodland’s Bandstand Stage tomorrow and he’s also helping run the stage with his friend Cal, using and donating their own sound system for the weekend:

“These small stages are important for grassroots artists without funding.

“I was brought in as an artist with Telekinephews but, through the spirit of DIY culture, we brought the P.A. and had a bigger role in sound engineering and booking the bands.

“Festivals are a place of discovery. We want to think of these stages as being a mine for hidden gems and creating ‘if you were there, you were there’ moments (the musical equivalent of my sandcastle friends).

“It’s important to nourish artists. I guess very quickly Telekinephews understood the need for DIY culture, to promote honesty, integrity and give a platform; so, we developed Big Nephew events to promote those sorts of events.”

Joe talks with such passion about music and making music happen it’s infectious. As are Telekinephews on both performances, as the sense of care and enthusiasm Joe has for music is transfused through him and the rest of the band.

I’m Holden Caulfield again as I go to get a programme for stage times to properly plan the weekend. What really knocks me out is £6 for a programme! I don’t know what festival etiquette is, but to not offer the information of who is playing what stage and at what time is the equivalent of going to the cinema, buying a ticket and not telling you what time the film starts or what screen it’s on.

To be fair, you could walk round each stage and take a picture of each chalkboard by the stages, but there was not, as far as I could see, one at the main stage.

So, here’s a few pictures of what some poor sucker had to pay £6 for.

Tucked away from the main walkway is the Woodland Bandstand (the very same one mentioned by Joe), and Makongo takes to the stage.

Singer Ngana takes a step toward the audience, wearing shades and a Scott McTominay overhead kick T-shirt, and asks us: “Are you ready for the Revolution!?”

Makongo

! Listen, pal!

We the people are stronger united.

We the people are better together.

I want you to have a better life.

I am just here to make my life better.

I am not the problem.

The problem is not me.

Not me, not me.

I am just the scapegoat!

Described as blending traditions from across the globe, music rooted in hip-hop yet reaching far beyond it, fusing cultures, stories, and experiences that celebrate collaboration and resilience.

Ngana tells us before his next song that the best dancer gets a passport! He’s not joking. It’s one of the best pieces of promotion/merch I’ve seen. Each band member is inside, along with the story of the band and the lyrics.

Makongo finishes up and a Scottish festival tradition begins.

It starts to rain.

I retreat to the sacred, hallowed ground of my one-man tent. It’s the sophomore slump of the day as the afternoon coffee en route has long since left the system…

It’s Saturday.

I awake from my beauty sleep feeling less rested than before I slept, the wonders of camping! My neck and back want to speak to the manager. But if you want to make a festival-y omelette, you’ve got to break a few spinal column-y eggs.

I stumble forth and sit with my fellow weary travellers; a communal Kraft macaroni is cooked and handed out. Mankind has peaked with macaroni for breakfast.

At 2am Scotland will play their first World Cup game in 28 years, and Rabbie’s Tavern stage will be showing it live. I’m as excited as can be and can’t think of a better way to take it in than in the middle of a field in Dumfries and Galloway. Armed in my new Scotland shirt (fakey, of course, I’m not made of money, you know. £75 for a top at retail! The biggest rip-off since Programme Gate!), I make my way in.

Midday, Rabbie’s Tavern, and Vibrant Rebels open the Saturday stage. Two days running I’ve stumbled into this venue to start the day. I count nine members, the sound as full and whole as you’d imagine. It’s a decent crowd for what followed an undoubtedly heavy night for a good portion of the attendees; hangovers hover softly in the morning air.

The crowd is sprinkled with children and families, some of which are possibly attending their first festivals together. You can see early memories being formed. Having families and kids at festivals helps keep you grounded, bringing forth an automatic level of care and responsibility we’d hope others would show if we had young kids of our own there.

That is another thing I like about field festivals. It comes with a sense of communal care and a genuine sense of wanting to make sure everyone around you is safe which, sadly, can feel somewhat lacking living within the hustle and bustle of city life. For me at least, I come with the intention and notion of supporting the communal atmosphere and respecting the land.

A thumping rendition of “Feel Good Inc” by Gorillaz bursts forth and the early crowd erupts. The saxophone player jumps from the stage to dance and play with the audience, the slick guitar riff piercing through the early-day grog and blaring like an alarm clock for the recently awoken.

It’s across to the Vishnu Lounge, where Fettle, a two-handed folk duo, offer a softer, soothing alternative to the start of the day… the start of the day for me at least. Because from 10am on

Friday till 4am Monday morning, the Vishnu Lounge is constantly open and hosting performers or playing music. That’s crazy!

Two wooden structures with hanging hammocks both in front of and behind the performers, where a row of bathtubs (unfilled) work as seated additions. Surprisingly comfortable, tricky to get out of, or maybe that’s just me after a night of camping. Like a fading action star, every year after the first night of camping I slowly rise, I look upon the site, body aching, slowly inhaling and exhaling a cigarette, and say, “I’m getting too old for this shit.”

Flanked by leather sofas and a hanging teepee-like structure, this is the kind of place you could sit and become absorbed by the sounds and welcoming atmosphere. Hours could go by without noticing. Often these are my favourite moments, when the rules and concept of time no longer apply.

I sit in the bathtub and talk to the kilted man beside me. He tells me he’s worn his kilt for four straight days. He puts my Scottishness to shame but bestows upon me a pink flowery wreath I promise to wear for the rest of the day and return to him at the Scotland game (I’m so sorry, Nadean, I couldn’t find you and still have it at home! Hit me up, bro!).

I meet another friend from Glasgow. We sit and roll a cigarette, her voice rough and coarse. She played the Cabaret Bar last night but, upon going up, her technician had vanished, so just belted her songs out acoustic. This is somehow more rock and roll than if her set had gone to plan, art from adversity.

She says, “Right, shall we mosey on up to purgatory?” and so we do.

Polar Bears in Purgatory

Polar Bears in Purgatory, described as: “An energetic, melodic punk trio whose down-to-earth humour and catchy hooks are unparalleled.” What’s not to like?

I’ve seen them before, but there’s an extra member this time on keys and trumpet.

I ask him, “Are you a new polar bear?”

“Ehh… I’d say half polar bear.”

No matter the percentage ratio of polar bear to man, he’s a welcome addition to Purgatory.

The songs are fast and frenetic. This sort of music reminds me of the early 2000s, sitting and scrolling between the two music channels we had at home, sitting in hope more than expectation to catch a video or song I liked.

They play a song, “How Hard Is It Not To Be A Dick?” — another pertinent question. I think about how profound some of the questions have been this weekend. Can I drink 45 pints of fortified wine? Am I ready for the revolution?

Before the next song starts, the singer states: “This next one’s not a song; it’s a recipe for chips.

Wow! Soul-searching and cooking instructions!

It’s the Main Stage for Colonel Mustard and the Dijon 5. It’s as busy as I’ve seen so far. The front of the stage is a muddy marshland, but the dancers seem undeterred, dancing with the same bombastic energy that comes with this huge-sounding 11-piece band!

Colonel Mustard and the Dijon 5

“Ok, the front is really marshy, is there a space in the middle we can make a little dancing amphitheatre?”

Despite being Glasgow and festival stalwarts, this is somehow, and rather criminally, the first time I’ve seen them! I’ve been missing out. How could you possibly not be in a good mood while listening to Colonel Mustard?

It’s the sort of feel-good music festivals were born for.

“We’re gonna try a new one and it’s called ‘In the Moment’, which is the only place to be.”

It feels like the feel-good hit of the summer…well if that wasn’t already a song by Queens of the Stone Age.

“So just live in the moment… and behave yourself.”

I catch stray lines as I write, something about “a taxi driver with flatulence” and something about drinking Buckfast. I ponder if the good Colonel has ever considered if he himself could drink 45 pints of said beverage?

A selection of beach balls lay in the marshy stage front. There are kids in wellies and families kicking them about and enjoying it with equal pleasure, as if they were at the beach. One of them comes my way and I pass it back. A wee boy passes it to me again, which I return in kind. I find myself in a passing drill, which moves on to him taking shots at me as a goalkeeper.

I wish I could say I was letting the shots in, but honestly this kid, at five, is better at shooting than I am with an actual ball.

His mum comes over and we chat about how a “beat the goalkeeper” with a set of goals would have gone down really well. An opportunity missed, perhaps.

I refrain from my Gianluigi Buffon duties to acquire strong coffee number two of the day before returning for She Drew the Gun.

She Drew the Gun, fronted by Louisa Roach, are described as entering a “musical world informed by influences ranging from 80s electronica, hip-hop, political poetry, and cosmic Scouse psychedelia”.

I’ve often found it hard to describe music, ironic, I know, as I sit trying to do just that. I have a very strong musical sense and intuition, but trying to define or pigeonhole a genre of music almost feels like it does the music itself a disservice.

She Drew The Gun

Seeing as that’s why I’m here though… The set reminds me of something between Billy Nomates and Kae Tempest.

In particular, “Became” is a standout. I personally like music with that slight darker edge and this one drips in it.

“And it’s for Land money power

And that’s the truest why

And every second minute hour

Will never satisfy

The black hearts of the war men

As they launder genocide

And the weak hearts of the law men

With power on their side”

It’s a great set and I promise myself I won’t write anything silly or cliched like “She Drew the Gun and blew me away”… I suppose I just did, dammit.

One final return to the Woodland Bandstand for another hidden gem and potentially my highlight of the festival: Sloblins.

Sloblins

Described as: “Scottish Budget Slob Rock. The simplicity of a nursery rhyme, the smell of a nappy crime.”

This is like if The Grinch Who Stole Christmas formed a punk band.

Fully kitted in all goblin attire, songs abruptly stop so Mr Sloblin can attempt a handstand and cartwheel and, of course, songs about finding it hard to pee and poo.

Now, depending on your taste, this may sound absolutely awful or absolutely amazing. Honestly, there will exist bands where the goblin aspect is a gimmick to disguise the music not being very good. But honestly, these guys are excellent.

Don’t be fooled by the foolishness.

Or maybe do be fooled by the foolishness!

If Dick and Dom had pursued punk music instead of kids’ TV, it would be this.

Sloblins

Just before approaching the Main Stage, to the right is The Melodrome, tucked in beside the beautiful old-fashioned ferris wheel. Some form of child-like wonder pulls you towards it like a moth to a flame, and I find myself throughout the day just sitting by it and watching it go round.

Another activity that can make time dissolve.

The Melodrome resembles an old Punch and Judy-style stage, with curtains that both cover and reveal the bands.

Maz and the Phantoms

It’s here I’m seeing Maz and the Phantoms (with the added bonus of Jude Norton-Smith also being the bass player, does their talent know no end!?)

Described as: “A kaleidoscopic fusion of genres that incorporates surf guitars, catchy sing-along hooks, dance-inducing breaks, and an unparalleled electric intensity.”

It’s a powerhouse performance, full of energy, enthusiasm and connection with fans new and old.

Having played the Main Stage the day before, they now play a packed Melodrome as the sun sets and the colours become richer. A beaming yellow light from the ferris wheel and the rich stage lights combine to create some of my favourite photos from the weekend.

The audience dance along to their latest single, “Pigeon Song”, with Jude dutifully demonstrating the moves to be followed along with.

As a pigeon lover, I can’t express the joy of seeing a crowd full of people mimicking the world’s best bird! Pigeon lovers of the world, unite!

Rabbie’s Tavern, 1:30am.

I’m there early, of course I am, both me and Scotland have waited long enough for this moment!

Have Mercy Las Vegas finish their set with renditions of “Yes Sir, I Can Boogie” and “We’ll Be Coming Down the Road”.

The place is absolutely bouncing. I subsequently find out the band are responsible for arranging the stream and the game being shown at the festival, so hats off to you. I hope Las Vegas does indeed show you mercy.

As they finish, I make my way to the front and see if any help is needed in the set-up.

The anticipation is building.

The plan is to stream it from a laptop through the projector onto a screen. Perfect, though it’s 1:55am and the kick-off is at 2am.

I strike up a conversation with the person next to me. I say, “I’m really excited but I’d also be more calm if the projection was on within 5 minutes of kick-off.”

“…his laptop has just started updating.”

With the bizarre kick-off time of 2am, I’d imagine that’s when the computer may automatically set itself to update.

Another slightly worried-looking guy comes over asking if it’s working yet.

I say to the guy: “Why don’t you go to the sound desk and get the radio commentary ready and we can play it over the speakers?”

A genius idea, I thought. He hurries away.

2 mins to kick-off. Squeaky bum time.

The crowd, being incredibly patient and trusting, breaks out into ‘Flower of Scotland’. I’m suddenly transported from being anxious for the stream; this alone is just fantastic.

And just as the room finishes its rendition, the live feed works, the projector is on and Scotland at the World Cup is up on the screen!

The cheer that erupts is equal to that of having scored.

It’s jubilant, it’s wild.

“No Scotland, no party, baby!”

…and then the football starts.

Boy, oh boy, Scotland are a tough watch.

I pity the football neutral tuning in for patriotic curiosity only to watch this dire, dire style of football play out.

But at the end of the day, it’s all about the result and, despite playing fairly uninspiring football, this Scotland national team is the most successful in my lifetime.

Scotland go on to beat Haiti 1–0.

Apparently, the national anthem in the stadium was the loudest noise recorded at a World Cup game, but Rabbie’s Tavern upon the final whistle can’t be far off.

Terrible, terrible football!

Brilliant, brilliant result!

By the time we stumble out it’s 4:30am and its essentially daylight, so we go in with dark skies, Scotland wins, and beautiful blue skies shine upon the land of the free… (the land of the free, who voted against our own independence…)

I decide to go for a walk around the empty stages.

I love empty spaces after big events have occurred. It’s got a haunting quality, like the memory and energy of the event still linger in the air for a while after. The ghost of events past, present and yet to come.

There is an almost mist-like fog that hangs in the air, and through the fog appears… a bottle of fortified wine?

“Is this a Buckie bottle which I see before me?

The handle towards my hand.

Come, let me clutch thee.

I have thee not, and yet I see thee still.

Art thou not, fatal Buckie, as sensible to feeling as to sight?

Or art thou but a Buckie of the mind, a false creation.

Proceeding from a Buckie-oppressed brain?”

As the time of night/morning finally catches up with me, I follow the air-drawn Buckfast towards my tent and into slumber.

It’s Sunday.

I find myself at the Main Stage for the first performance of the day.

Niamh Corkey plays, lullaby-esque, to the early-day risers. It’s perfect Sunday music.

Niamh Corkey

Mid-song, the stage generator suddenly goes out. Without missing a beat, Niamh and her band come to the front of the stage, climbing down onto the speakers so they are right at the front and continue playing acoustic, a cappella style.

This is met in kind by the audience, who all move forward and congregate around the stage front. This offers a wonderful intimate, interactive performance for the rest of the set, just like one of Joe Miskimmins’ “if you were there, you were there” moments.

Honestly, it couldn’t have gone better had things gone to plan. Once again, art from adversity.

To top it off, the warm sun has begun pushing through the clouds and arching just over the top of the stage.

Niamh Corkey

I’m back in the bathtub, where to the rather shall his day’s hard journey soundly invite him?

A lilting, ethereal music drifts from the stage.

Half-conscious couples sway from hammocks, lulled by the soothing sounds, sleep-deprived and spent but finding simple comfort and solace in one another’s arms.

Warm bodies, warm souls.

My friend Claire tells me she’s just spent the last 10 minutes gently rocking Bob from Telekinephews in one of the hammocks like a baby while he lay dreaming.

Ah yes, sleep. Sleep that knits up the ravelled sleeve of care.

And it makes me reflect upon the weekend.

Am I ready for the revolution? How hard is it not to be a dick? Can I drink 45 pints of fortified wine?

I realise every single one of the musicians who have played here this weekend will no doubt have dreamed of doing so at one point. Every single great band and moment of time started with a dream, a notion, and over the course of the weekend, as lack of sleep leads to waking dream, dreams and reality intertwine and become one beautiful dancer.

So literally anything you can hope to achieve is possible. Anything that can be conceived sitting in a bathtub in the middle of Dumfries and Galloway can be accomplished.

So, I make the decision to visit the wishing tree. A table with material strips and marker pens lies vacant. The universe, like a genie, at this moment offers me the chance to make one wish. One wish to make my dreams come true.

I pick up the pen. Ponder briefly. And then write what my heart desires.

I place the pen back down and tie it to the tree. I take in my masterpiece. Thank the tree. And then walk away.

Knowing with this request in the hands of the universe, everything’s going to be alright…