Festivals

Due to excessive traffic issues and poor time management, we are entering BST Hyde Park much later than planned this fine sunny Sunday afternoon. Luckily we grab our wristbands and a drink just in time to get a good spot in front of the Great Oak stage for my 90’s manic-pixie-dream-girl crush Gwen Stefani (pretty sure she was everyone’s 90’s celeb crush actually).

Were you even a 90’s kid if you didn’t have that one No Doubt centre-magazine poster on your wall? You know which one I mean. It just occurred to me that kids now probably don’t buy physical magazines… what are they decorating their rooms with…

Anyway, Gwen bounces onto the stage resplendent in a disco ball inspired outfit for opener ‘The Sweet Escape’ right into No Doubt classic ‘Sunday Morning’, like there hasn’t been a single minute between the day she wrote it and now. Yelling “I don’t think you guys understand the love I have for London Town… let me pinch myself, THIS IS MY LIFE!” before busting out another classic – ‘It’s My Life’ (Talk Talk cover).

In a curious revelation about the inner workings of her mind, she blurts out “I was thinking about my life. Most of the time when I’m singing the songs, I’m thinking – what am I gonna have to eat later? Thank you for listening to my music all this time” which comes across a little odd, a little nonchalant, given her previous emphatic affectations about her work.

Nevertheless, ‘Underneath It All’ brings the groove back, admittedly with a small side of cringe these days – the ska/reggae overlap has always been part of Stefani’s music but it is one of those things that we’ve gradually distanced ourselves from since the early noughties. It would be remiss of me to write about Gwen Stefani without joining the chequered commentary about cultural appropriation vs. appreciation over her recording history, and the inclusion of controversial ‘Harajuku Girls’ and iconic ‘Rich Girl’ give me awkward pause for thought. Bringing on stage rapper Eve for a duet/cover of her song ‘Let Me Blow Ya Mind’ was extremely welcome though, being immediately transported back to 2001 in the opening notes.

After what looks like a slight bra malfunction, Gwen returns in yet another skirt/trouser combo that also smacks of very firmly Y2K vibes, but that ska checkerboard pattern will never not appeal to me – even the dancers are rocking matching jumpsuits. Oh and she’s being wheeled around on a giant throne, also fun.

‘Don’t Speak’ is where this set truly comes alive for me again, from there it’s a hit parade of core memory songs, with ‘Wind It Up’, and ‘What You Waiting For’ into ‘Spiderwebs’ which I screamed at the top of my extremely limited vocal range for.

‘Just A Girl’ is everything I want, remember and enjoy about Gwen Stefani. Her unique vocal sound seems unchanged by time, and it feels like such a treat for teenage-me to finally end up here, hearing it the way I did dancing with my friends in the living room to MTV. To cap it off, the slightly ridiculous ‘Hollaback Girl’ features dancers wielding giant bananas while she gads about in a sparkly cape – big Gwen energy.

There’s a pretty decent time gap before tonight’s main act, due in part to the absolutely insane stage set up being hastily squashed into view, so we have a little reprieve to check out some of the food options here at BST. For a relatively small festival footprint, you can pretty much find cuisine from most corners of the earth – but still settle for basic bitch buffalo loaded fries if you want to (and I did) but you better believe I’ll be sampling my way through as many outlets as possible over the coming weeks of BST gigs. They were delicious anyway. Though I didn’t make it around the rest of the site today due to time constraints, it’s nice to note that the site has lost none of its vibrancy from last year – there is colour, decoration and things to pique your interest everywhere you look. More exploration required.

With the sun beginning to dip over Hyde Park, it’s time to settle into our spots for tonight’s headliner, the incomparable wonder woman that is P!NK. Every single person I’ve met who has been to one of her shows assures me that she is incredible and possibly superhuman, so I’ve got a lot of hype and anticipation for this one – and it seems I am not alone. It’s a huge crowd tonight (and yes, a good percentage of that is potentially people who did not get Glasto tickets this weekend but we won’t dwell on that) but it is also a very female centric crowd too with a wide and enviable age range. I think if you’re the kind of performer who can appeal to three generations of women at the same time – you’ve kind of hit the jackpot, and that’s what I’m seeing here.

So when the stage screens light up with Pink’s AI avatar to introduce her Summer Carnival, I am understandably already enthralled to see the bottom of her sparkly silver boots hiding away up in the canopy of the stage, behind a giant Rocky Horror style mouth. The mouth opens to reveal Pink herself wearing a gemstone-encrusted leotard, who then plummets to the stage on a bungee cord before styling it out into something between circus and x-games. I have no desire to do such a thing personally, but I truly could watch her do an entire set up there, she is SO FUN.

Obviously the opening line is “I’m coming out” from ‘Get The Party Started’ because that is quite literally the perfect point to hurtle towards the audience with the sheer glee of someone with seemingly zero inhibitions or fear. Iconic.

‘Raise Your Glass’ will forever hit the spot with lyrics that celebrate the ‘underdog’, I think this is why the entire crowd tonight bar absolutely no-one, is singing along with wild abandon. It’s true that P!NK sits apart from other artists of her time, unlike the polished teen aesthetic of Britney and Christina, Pink had tattoos and short hair, swore and leaned into a grittier rock vocal sound. The genre-straddling appeal teamed with often inspirational and introspective lyrical content, has firmly rooted Pink in a place where we are appreciating her work throughout her career instead of just waiting for those early-days hits.

Oh and her wardrobe is beyond enviable honestly. I would 1000% try and steal that studded and glittery leather jacket if I saw it in a dressing room, watch out Alecia. Taking a quick pause to chat to those in the front rows Golden Circle area, she addresses a young fan “Happy birthday you’re 10, double digits, you’re gonna save the world… can’t wait!” and jokes “So many kids here.. oh god I’m such a mom now” before busting out classic ‘Who Knew’.

During ‘Just Like A Pill’ Pink is presented with an unenviably awkward situation, that I really feel she handles with incredible grace. Over the last few months we have witnessed Harry Styles being asked to do gender reveals on stage, Elton John’s farewell Glasto set the same night had cameras diverted to a couple getting engaged in the crowd… all sorts of interesting fan interactions. This though, feels like an absolute violation.

As Pink takes a small mid-song reprieve and walks down the runway, she is showered with gifts like flowers and soft-toys – cute right? Less cute is the Ziploc bag of ashes that is next to be hurled into her path. “Wait, is this your mom? I don’t know how I feel about this…” a clearly stunned Pink exclaims whilst gingerly picking it up and placing it carefully by one of the speakers. She then returns to singing but there’s an obvious wobble in her voice for those first few notes, and upon ending she quips “Well… that was a first” whilst looking uncomfortable. I get the sentiment of wanting to symbolically take your loved and missed person to something important to you, but truly this is intrusively unhinged behaviour, to actually throw human remains onto a stage. This moment will undoubtedly be filed in the same zone as Ozzy-biting-the-head-off-a-bat in rock’n’roll history I’m sure, but it speaks to the ever closing space celebrities are able to hold between themselves, and what fans think they’re entitled to.

Consummate performer that she is, Pink returns in a sparkly checked shirt and joined by a beautiful male duo dance performance for ‘What About Us’, followed by an aerial performance of her own – but not without a technical hitch. “Stop. Can we re-set? It’s too low. We just need six inches…” has the entire crowd giggling. “I’ll just do an Interpretive dance if this doesn’t work, I’ll tell jokes! Ok, go back into the sexy serious thing we were trying to do…” before performing ‘Turbulence’ whilst spinning around on a rope swing. I have no clue how she is managing to sound this good, doing that.

Back on solid ground once more, Pink heads to the piano saying “There are so many songs I wish I wrote… oh look at the sunset! I wish I wrote ‘Spiderwebs’… ‘Just A Girl’… ‘Don’t Speak’. My absolute She-ro Gwen Stefani is over there, you don’t get cooler than that” pointing stage side where Gwen is watching the show. “I also wish I wrote Baby Shark. I could buy everyone here a yacht” she laughs before performing a gorgeous cover of Bob Dylan’s ‘Make You Feel My Love’.

In another big moment, someone in the front decides to propose to their partner during this, which she notices “Did someone just pass out or propose? Was it a yes? Wooo! The first 20 years are the hardest” before going into the beautifully soulful ‘Just Give Me A Reason’.

‘F**kin’ Perfect’ sees Pink in yet another extremely steal-able studded biker jacket, this time in eponymous baby pink, before she changes into the early noughties revival outfit that we are now seeing on ASOS (RIP my youth). More rip-than-material crystal studded jeans and a leopard print corset were the lifeblood of Y2K teens. Add a diamante-butterfly backed g-string and you’ve hit peak Paris and Nicole.

With barely a break, we head into the third stage of this this epic show, with an acoustic ‘Please Don’t Leave Me’ and bringing her daughter Willow on stage to join her for the adorable ‘Cover Me in Sunshine’ in front of a glowing sun stage set, mirrored by the setting sun behind us.

“You know them right, First Aid Kit? These beautiful sisters… they were nice enough to write me this song” Pink leads in for ‘Kids In Love’ which is unmistakably First Aid Kit in composition. It’s a deliciously sweet twilight song, the kind you’d use as a backing track for a campfire scene, it’s going on my summer playlist.

The phone torch lights are out in force for ‘When I Get There’, she signs stuff for front row fans during ‘I Am Here’ before diving into protest anthem ‘Irrelevant’ “When I sing this song, you all have permission to lose your last marble”. In a post-Roe world we need more voices, and yelling “girls just wanna have rights” everywhere she goes is positive platform action.

“Yall ready to dance?” she yells, as the dancers whip off their velco trousers to reveal classic 80’s bodysuit-and-legwarmers gym wear, as she arrives back on stage in a silver bomber jacket doing fitness-video moves for ‘Runaway’.

Album namesake ‘Trustfall’ is highlighted by an amazing stairs/trampoline show where acrobats fell and popped back up in time to the music, before ‘Blow Me One Last Kiss’ in contrast featured dancers dressed in kinda creepy lips costumes and we dance our socks off to ‘Never Gonna Not Dance Again’. Finally, yelling “I’m coming to see you guys at the back” we get to see what the four giant cranes flanking the stadium are there for, as Pink is hoisted up into the air over the crowd during ‘So What’. I don’t know how she sings like she does while flying around above thousands of people but it truly cements her line “I’m still a rockstar” for me. What a bloody legend, please come back soon.